Topic: Commencement

Former Google CEO Eric Schmidt was booed during a commencement speech at UCF while discussing the "Industrial Revolution" of Artificial Intelligence. Students reportedly walked out as Schmidt described AI's future impact on every profession and relationship. The segment notes that the "Architects of AI" were named Time Magazine's Person of the Year for 2025, reflecting the growing public tension surrounding the technology.

A small group of students walked out of Jerry Seinfeld's commencement address at Duke University to protest the war in Gaza. The hosts dismiss the event as "bullcrap news," noting that the vast majority of the 20,000 attendees cheered for the comedian.

Adam and John conduct the formal commencement ceremony for the new Knights, Dames, and PhD graduates. They list the symbolic food and drink items brought to the "Round Table" and direct the new producers to NoAgendaRings.com to claim their certificates and physical rings.

Vice President Kamala Harris delivered a commencement address at West Point, emphasizing the defense of democratic ideals and her recent visits to NATO's eastern flank in Poland. The hosts critique her rhetorical style, specifically her repeated use of the phrase "unburdened by what has been." A "sweetened" version of the audio is played, featuring cinematic sound effects to highlight her delivery.

The UC Berkeley School of Public Health held a virtual commencement featuring Assistant Dean Quinn Hussey, who opened the ceremony with a formal land acknowledgment for the Ohlone people. The event also included a minute of silence for lives lost to police violence, setting a highly political tone for the graduation.

Actor Tom Hanks is criticized for a "discombobulated" and poorly produced virtual commencement speech for Wright State University. The hosts mock the low audio quality and the "phoned-in" nature of the address, noting that a professional producer of his stature should have utilized better technology and production values.

The University of Texas at Austin held its commencement ceremony where 9,600 degrees were conferred, including over 6,700 bachelor's degrees. Contrary to expectations of liberal arts dominance, the most popular majors for the graduating class were business administration, economics, accounting, and finance.

Hillary Clinton returned to her alma mater, Wellesley College, to deliver a commencement address marked by a recurring coughing fit that required medical assistance from aides. During the speech, Clinton reflected on her time as a student in 1969 and discussed her path from graduation to winning the popular vote in the 2016 presidential election.

National Security Advisor Susan Rice is criticized for a commencement speech at Florida International University where she lamented that the national security workforce is "white, male, and Yale." The hosts argue that politicizing a graduation ceremony with diversity quotas is inappropriate and fails to provide the traditional "inspirational" message expected at such events.

President Obama's commencement speeches at Rutgers and other universities are criticized for focusing on political attacks against Donald Trump rather than inspiring graduates. Obama's remarks targeted the idea that "ignorance is a virtue" and challenged the rejection of political correctness. The use of graduation ceremonies as a platform for partisan campaigning is noted as a departure from tradition.

Bill Nye received a $35,000 fee for a commencement speech at Rutgers University, a practice typically done for an honorary degree. Nye also appeared in a sketch on Amy Schumer's Comedy Central show regarding the universe. The segment mocks the idea of the universe "sending signals" to individuals for mundane life choices.

Bill Nye "The Science Guy" received $35,000 to deliver a commencement speech at Rutgers University, where he compared climate change denial to denying the link between smoking and cancer. He urged graduates to "get to work" and cited Article 1, Section 8 of the Constitution regarding the promotion of science. The hosts mock Nye's "hip" persona and his aggressive stance against climate skeptics.

White House advisor Valerie Jarrett delivered a commencement speech at Pomona College that included jokes about the government's ability to see what students do online. The hosts find the jokes inappropriate given the NSA's failure to prevent domestic attacks like the Isla Vista shooting despite the suspect's public threats.

Former IBM CEO Sam Palmisano delivered a commencement speech at Johns Hopkins University after receiving an honorary doctorate. Palmisano went off-script to mention his previous degree from the institution, referring to his prepared remarks as a "script."

Baltimore Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake delivered a commencement speech that is compared to the rhetorical styles of Oprah Winfrey and Michelle Obama. The speech emphasized the role of parents and educators in student success. The Mayor's mannerisms and tone are described as part of a specific archetype of modern political oratory.

Political figures including Mitt Romney, Barack Obama, and Janet Napolitano are increasingly using university commencement speeches as strategic status symbols. Romney recently addressed Liberty University to bolster support among evangelical conservatives. These appearances are characterized as efforts to align with powerful academic institutions and influence specific voter demographics.

A clip featuring Arnold Schwarzenegger's signature movie catchphrases is played as a parody of a university commencement address. The hosts joke about the Governor's reliance on buzz phrases and his high speaking fees.

A host describes attending the commencement ceremony for his son at Evergreen State College, noting that such elaborate ceremonies are a uniquely American tradition. The discussion compares US graduation customs, involving caps, gowns, and valedictorian speeches, to the more subdued degree-granting processes in Europe.

During the Evergreen State College graduation, a speaker reportedly urged students to "help Obama," framing the presidency as a cause for the youth to support. The keynote speaker, David Whyte, a "corporate poet," was introduced with a degree in "zoology," which the hosts mock for its mispronunciation and perceived lack of academic rigor.

First Lady Michelle Obama is scheduled to give a commencement speech at UC Merced, drawing a massive crowd to the rural California campus. Her previous public appearances at schools during the G20 summit in London are also noted.