Topic: Dole

Residents of Springfield, Ohio, testified at a city council meeting regarding the behavior of new Haitian arrivals, alleging the theft of livestock and the butchering of ducks and geese in public parks. Some residents claimed to have witnessed the gutting of roadkill on highways. Despite local outcry, industrial employers like Dole and local manufacturing plants continue to advocate for the influx of cheap labor to fill positions.

Senator Rand Paul's questioning of Dr. Anthony Fauci regarding $193 million in secret royalty payments to 1,800 NIH employees is reviewed. Fauci cites the Bayh-Dole Act as the reason these payments are not disclosed on financial statements. The hosts argue this represents a massive conflict of interest and regulatory capture by the pharmaceutical industry.

Actor Tom Hanks spoke at the memorial service for Senator Bob Dole, leading the hosts to speculate that Hanks is being groomed for a political career in California. They compare this potential move to Ronald Reagan's path from the Screen Actors Guild to the governorship. The discussion also touches on Matthew McConaughey's decision not to run for Governor of Texas.

Alexa Delgado and Julian Robbins are knighted after reaching the $1,000 donation threshold. Their ceremony includes requests for "vignettes and beignets" (French donuts) and "mayonnaise and kale." The hosts joke about their "exit strategy" involving reverse mortgages and thank the couple for their years of support.

During the DNC roll call, Cece Goldwater, granddaughter of Barry Goldwater, cast votes for Barack Obama. A delegate from Kansas used his floor time to claim that the modern Republican Party has repudiated Bob Dole in favor of the "extremism" of Ayn Rand and the Koch brothers.

A new report from the Bipartisan Policy Center, founded by figures like Bob Dole and George Mitchell, warns that Al-Qaeda remains a threat. The hosts criticize the 44-page document as a "piece of crap" filled with conjecture and designed to keep the public in a state of fear.