Smoke Gets In Your Eyes

00:01 It's dangerous to fly! It's dangerous to fly! Tell everybody to shut down! Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak. It's April 18th, 2010, time for your Gitmo Nation Media Assassination Episode 192. This is no agenda. Tracing the roots of Ashmageddon and coming to you from the Hilltop Watchtower Crackpot Command Center in Gitmo Nation West in the People's Republic of Southern California. In the morning, I'm Adam Curry. And from the northern heights of Silicon Valley North, I'm John C. Dvorak. In the morning, John. In the morning to you. And in the morning to everyone listening. Yes, and everybody on the stream, noagendastream.com and in the chatroom at noagendachat.com. Did you tweet? Yep. Ew. I forgot. Search on in the morning and you'll find my tweet. Why don't I just do a look at you, the real Dvorak.

01:05 Okay. Retweet. Perfect. Much easier. So, uh, wow. Where do we start? Ashmageddon? I don't know. You know, Ashmageddon is an interesting story only from the, I think, from the financial perspective and the fact that people that were stuck in France were also stuck with a railroad engineer train strike, which I thought was the irony of the whole thing. It is because I think that's actually what it's all about. I think this whole thing is about trains.

01:44 Yeah, what you mean they blew up the volcano so the train strike guys can make it up? No, no, no, no. You know, whether they blew the volcano or not is neither here nor there. But the way it's being used, as we know, even Rahm Emanuel says, never let a good crisis go to waste. I think that there's actual bull crap involved here to fear and to give people more fear, more shock about aviation. How unreliable it is and how horrible it is and we already have all of these security measures. I'm not seeing any of this. I don't see anybody saying it's unreliable or horrible. I just see a bunch of people stuck at the airport. Oh, it's implied. Oh, it's completely implied.

02:28 It's completely implied. I'm just not getting that. Well, why don't we do our executive producer first and associate executive producers, and then I'll go through some of the research. We have a really weird executive producer situation this week. Uh-oh. We have three executive producers and three associate executive producers, and the three executive producers each gave $333. That's a magic number Really this is good stuff. It's weird, but this is again of course anyone who's familiar with random number theory knows that stuff like this happens And it always happens like this, but this one here is really off the wall So let's go over who the guys are okay? Werner a flipson

03:26 Oh, I know Werner. Well, yes, he says hi. He says he's a bit late. He's apparently your friend at Sheep Pole. Yes, he's a good guy. Let's not say too much about Werner, but he's a good guy. He's from the Netherlands and he gave us $333.33. Maybe I should just say that for those who are donating $333.33, if you do it three times, we kick in the extra penny and make you a night on the spot. Yeah, we're big spenders when it comes to that kind of thing. We don't mess around. AJ Tissier from Normal, not Abnormal, but Normal, Illinois gave us $333.33. He's donating part of his tax refund. And he says he could use the karma even though he has a good job and he's making plenty of money at least. I love that. I'm making dough, man.

04:23 Well, we appreciate that. Matthew Hawking from Parkinson. Yeah, Matthew has donated before, hasn't he? Yes. And he actually donated at 3.30 in the morning. Yeah, he did it at 3.30. This three thing is a lot of control. No, it's not. It's good. At 3.30 in the morning, so he gave us $333. I just got out of a cab at a top talk to an African cab driver in Brisbane. Brisbane. Brisbane, say it right John. Talking all about New World Order all the way home. Anyway, I was thinking I would donate because I told him I would save a ring for me. It's going to be a night. He thinks the ring will help him pick up chicks.

05:09 Oh yeah, we haven't even talked about the power of the ring yet. Oh, we can't even imagine the power of the ring. You know, we're going to make a hundred of them, so there's going to be limited, so people better get in while they can. That'll be round one. The second ring we do, after we sell a hundred of them, we're not selling these to the knights. There'll be a two on the next batch and it'll be slightly different. Collect all. Yeah, collect them all. Okay, so our associate executive producer, iShare Media, who is gonna wonder if he's gonna become Sir iShare Media. Is iShare indeed a knight today?

05:55 He thinks he's a knight, but he did not, because he was donated as somebody else, I don't know if he wants his name mentioned. He would like to get a ring, but don't chop my head off, blah, blah, blah. We're going to have to do the math on this, because he didn't give us an accounting, and we didn't do it, so I'll have to, Eric can run it up later. Eric DeChille is... And he will do it next show, if he is. We're not prepared for a night. Then we have Nina Kristen Hetland from Norway. This is good, we have a lot, this is an international batch of people today in Norway and he says executive producer equals job.

06:38 I hope I have somewhere to go now when the government becomes even more dangerous, keep up the work, blah, blah, blah. Same good thing. And he gives 200 bucks. And then Charles Hendrickson from Manhattan, Indiana, 200 also, which is interesting numbers. Greetings John and Adam, I was finishing up my taxes today while listening to the show on the Zune. Yay. He's the hidden, the other four guys. It's him, it's him. It's Dean, the Zune-user. Because I'm sending a big check to the United States Treasury, I feel like terrible waste, so I decided to send you my PayPal balance. Nice balance. At least I know it will go to something positive, keep up the great work. And whatever happened to the wine reviews you promised? Yes. So Eric DeShill says that iShare Media actually has made a donation on behalf of someone else. That's a tough call now.

07:32 If you make it on behalf of someone else, then... Well, we'll be in touch with iShare Media and yeah, no, if it's in... No, I don't... Was that made on behalf of someone else or was it made by someone else's name that's the same person? See, this is what we have to clear up. I think we have to have a meeting. Let's have a meeting about this. Let's have a meeting. No meetings. I'd like to mention a couple of PR associates people who would like to become PR associates, let me put it this way.

08:09 The Ridley report calm did a nice little Now this is not I mean when I'm thinking of a PR associate, it's got to be big right like the billboard We had yeah the billboard or somebody does a piece of graffiti on the side of a cop car calling into a big national radio show or something like that It's gonna be Howard Stern would be funny. Well. That's not really big national anymore I know but it's still the irony would either be irony would be good. That's true then also a Tyler Glaze who Spent $10 on Xbox Live credits to change his, uh, his Microsoft Points to change his gamer tag to No Agenda Podcast. All of these good initiatives, of course, but we're really looking for something really, really big, obviously, to become a full-blown PR associate.

08:57 In the meantime, we would like to thank humbly Werner Flipson, AJ Tissier, Matthew Hawking as our executive producers of episode 192 and our associate executive producers iShare Media, Nina, Kristen Hetland and Charles Hendrickson. You know that you can put this on your resume, you can put it in your email signature, take out that sent from my iPhone thing, that's so incredibly lame, and put in executive producer or if appropriate, associate executive producer. of Noah Jendishow episode 192. And please, you know what to do. We've got a formula and it is your job to uphold it. Our formula is this. We go out, we hit people in the mouth. Order. Shut up, sleeve. So after the show on Thursday, John, when of course this ashmageddon took place,

10:01 I started getting a lot of emails from mainly musicians who were stuck in different parts of Europe and like, hey, they got screwed. Oh, yeah. You know, it's like, I got a guy who's going to play with Iggy Pop. He's got to get to Luxembourg or Strasbourg or whatever. And I'm like, you know what? I really don't know what's going on with general aviation. Now you would presume that aircraft that fly at much lower levels that don't have turbine engines that there wouldn't be a problem with them flying. So I start calling up my buddies and it's like no go, we're grounded, nothing in the sky and like wow that's pretty amazing. And I talked to my instructor, Wing Commander William who's, he's the kind of guy that really knows all the ins and outs of every aspect of aviation, wink wink, nudge nudge.

10:51 And I say, so how's the weather? He says, it is the most beautiful weather ever. Blue skies, temperature is fantastic, this will be awesome to fly in. So what, there's no like volcanic ash cloud? I said, no, there's no volcanic ash cloud here. I said, okay. So well, so is anyone flying VFR, visual flight rules, which means you fly below a certain altitude, which is much lower than this ash cloud is reported to be at. He said, well let me tell you what's happened to two of the guys that have aircraft maintained with him. One took off from a private strip in France and within like 15 minutes he had two Mirages flying next to him, forcing him to the ground. Mirages! So by the way, they also have jet engines. Yeah, why are the Mirages up in the air? Well, let me take it a little further. A guy took off from England

11:43 From a small strip, Royal Air Force right next to him, land. And I'm like, well, isn't that a little bit overkill? I mean, you know, air traffic control could basically say, excuse me, you must land now. Not only overkill, but you know how much it costs to fly those things just casually? Why yes, I happen to know that it's quite expensive and I so I said to the wing commander I said well, what is that all about? He says well, there's probably something else going on first clue and So, you know I've been searching and researching for the past two days because this doesn't feel right at all particularly if you look at the lamestream media

12:27 Which is, let me play this for you John, you have to listen to Rick Sanchez. Our new favorite guy. This is how the American media reports on this type of stuff. You've got to listen to this, this is just amazing. Oh, he's such a scientist. I was just asking Chad, how can you get a volcano in Iceland? Isn't it too... When you think of a volcano, you think of like Hawaii and long words like that. You don't think of Iceland. You think it's too cold to have a volcano there. But no, there it is. Look at that. What is this? It's too cold to have a volcano there, John. I think he was just being facetious.

13:28 Right into the flight path of a light into the flight path into the flight path So let me talk about that for a second because you know I was even a little skeptical on on Thursday show and I have to say you you jumped all over me saying no planes crash or engine stop Yeah, that is of course true But that's not with that's if you really fly through the direct cloud itself not necessarily this thing that is allegedly floating over Europe So here's what interests me. We have a couple of people who listen to the show who work at Eurocontrol, to be named not to be mentioned by the way. And so I pinged them, I said, you know, dude, what's going on with Eurocontrol? You know, what's the deal with this? Have you guys never expected something like this? Now take into account, the way the jet stream flows and the way almost all transatlantic flights are routed is always over Iceland.

14:28 Right? It's for two reasons. One for the jet stream, so you pick up some extra speed. And the other one is it's handy if you have an engine failure to have a place to land. So that's why you're kind of rounded that way. And also I think the curvature of the earth makes it a shorter route. So I say, you know, have you guys ever done any like exercises for this and it turns out that in November indeed Eurocontrol did an exercise in the event of a volcanic ash disaster but they did it in Italy. Of course they got some volcanoes there, so that kind of makes sense. But in all these years of transatlantic flight, they never did a volcanic ash exercise in the case one of these volcanoes in Iceland would erupt? That I found truly weird. Well, this thing only goes off once every six, seven hundred years, and I don't think anyone really anticipated it. I think the one thing, by the way, not to interrupt your train of thought here, but

15:32 We have to keep it in mind that every time this particular volcano seems to have erupted, its next door neighbor, which is something like five times bigger, tends to go off. Well, so that's my point. You're kind of proving it for me. So anyway, so the next thing is, where is this coming from? Where is this shutdown of all airspace coming from? And like, who's determining this? Well, it's coming from... I don't know. And no one really knows. Oh, that's interesting. Yeah, so I start tracing it back. It comes from ICAO, I-C-A-O, who by the way have nothing at all about this on their website. Not a news article, not a single thing.

16:17 ICAO is mainly responsible for navigational charts, of course the ICAO code, so each airport has a code. And this is a fine United Nations organization. They're getting their information from the VAAC, the Volcanic Ash I forgot the second A. Volcanic Ash Advisory Center, of which there are nine in the world and these are at the Met Office. Offices, I should say. The what offices? The meteorological offices. The people who bring you the weather. Weather guys. The weather guys. So all of Europe is shut down because the VAAC in London

17:05 has issued an advisory, it's a bunch of scientists saying, oh, you know what, the... The science is in! It's dangerous to fly! It's dangerous to fly! Tell everybody to shut down! And, uh... Now that has to be, you, that, hey, make a note of the time, that's the clip that starts the show. That's the clip? Okay, I'll sit it right there. You don't even, you sounded... I sounded good, didn't I? You sounded good. So, right, I'm looking at the volcanic ash advisory from London and it's aviation color code red. Whatever that means. No one knows what the hell this really means. So this is not an aviation shutdown. It's not like aviation experts said, wow, this is dangerous. No, government said, shut it down. This is dangerous. And now we've got, particularly in Norway,

18:06 where we have the president of Norwegian Air saying, hey, the danger of flying is really minimal. Even better, a Scandinavian Airlines captain says, this is the biggest hysteria of the century. Per Gunnar Stevensveig. Yeah, no, I think we've all seen these. No, no, I disagree. I don't think everyone has seen these. Well, that guy's been all over the blogs, that's for sure, that Scandinavian guy. Oh, really? Now, my take on the whole thing is that if there's not, if the skies are, like you say, if they say, if it's clear as a bell, yeah, obviously it's not a problem, but if there's a big cloud...

18:43 Well, first of all, you can only you can should be able to fly over the cloud because the thing is only going to the day say 30,000 30 35,000 feet. Maybe you can fly under the cloud. You can fly over the cloud, but there is no cloud. This is the whole point. There is no cloud KLM. The president of KLM was getting pissed off about this, you know, maybe losing all that money has something to do with it. His options are devaluing. They did a test flight last night, yesterday afternoon actually. They went up, they took it all the way up to 41,000 feet, they came back down, they checked the plane, there's like no ash! Nothing wrong. Lufthansa is flying planes, repositioning planes between Dusseldorf and Munich, I believe. So that when aviation cranks up again, they have to have crews and planes in the right spot.

19:40 So they're flying planes. Oh, and did I mention perhaps that Arabian-owned private 747s were allowed to take off and go home? Go ahead. You know, it's always like that, just like a 9-11. No one can fly except a couple of Arab guys. The Pope gladly took to the skies from Rome. Now granted that Rome is a little bit south of the purported danger area, but he went off to go join the Knights of Malta. on his flight and everywhere I keep reading more and more reports of there just not really being any cloud that anyone can see. And so how dangerous can this be? And there's like no end in sight. No end in sight to this thing. So I'm just gonna call it a hoax.

20:38 I am. It's a total hoax. So in Norway, you can't fly helicopters. They've even grounded those. Go look at the news and go watch helicopters landing in sandstorms in Iraq, or even the sandstorms they create themselves when they land. It's not quite as dangerous as it's being portrayed. Yes, if you fly through the black cloud, then these particles can, I guess they can actually melt or remelt inside jet engines and clog them up. And there's all kinds of, you know, examples of... I don't think anyone's actually crashed. They have had to lose altitude and restart the engines. And I think every single time that's happened it's turned out okay. But to shut down European aviation for now, we're now, what are we now, on day five?

21:35 Thursday, Friday, day four? Yeah, I thought they'd be back flying yesterday. So it probably won't happen until until Monday at the earliest but from all the predictions are handing out Well, you know the thing is you can go up This is not a new technology You can go up with a plane or anything you want with these various filtering devices that are used by the air pollution control districts around the world and they gather anything that's in the air a particulate and that mainly which would be what you're worried about here which is just a solid particles are microscopic and you can collect these things and flying back down and you can make a calculation on how many of these things per square mile of the air there are and and how potentially dangerous uh... the situation would be i have heard that i have heard none of this it's not unusual

22:28 thing to do. But I haven't heard any reports back saying, yeah, we've filtered the air in this airspace and there's nothing here or that this is just enough here to make it slightly dangerous. Neither one. It's just this straight up, you know, we got somebody who shut it down and we got Mirage jets flying around in the stuff. to bring down private planes. So you might be right, there may be some other thing at play here. And there is the railroad strike, which I don't know, has it ended yet? I'm not sure. Well, let me just say a couple of other things. The way that I understand volcanic ash to be measured is with laser.

23:05 So there's a certain type of laser that you can shoot through, you know, whatever cloud they would be in. Yeah, you could do that. Yeah, and it can measure the particles. But all of this apparently has been based upon computer models. Oh, that's not good. Exactly. So you've got these volcanic ash... Advisory centers and they've got these more likely it's probably running on Windows 7 so they've got these computer models that say oh you shouldn't fly but it's not actual aviators who are saying this is dangerous now there is an upside to all of this and I've seen this mentioned all over the blogs and Twitter it has been very nice not having any chemtrails for a while

23:45 Everyone feels happy, we're upbeat, we're really... Maybe that's the idea. It could be! To keep your well-being improved, or to improve your well-being by eliminating... Over Europe is a plot, it's a scheme by the counterintelligence groups... Shut up. Yeah, shut up. You know what, I'm telling you, this is at best being misused... And it's, I'm telling you, there is something entirely wrong about this. You have to understand what the economic impact is. It's not just tens of thousands of passengers who are stuck at European airports and foreign airports not being able to get in or out. I mean, there's freight, there's mail, there's so much stuff that is sent via air. And I think

24:35 I really think that this is going to be misused to say, you know, we really need to... You mean like perhaps the FedEx shipments that are now backed up in Nashville and elsewhere that now you have just enough time for intelligence officers to finally go through all the stuff being shipped to one guy or another? You're worse than I am. You are really bad. It gives you a lot of time. Hey, we got how much more time do we have? We're going to keep we're going to keep us shut down for two more days. We've got to find that package. Hand me the Stanley knife. I need to open up this box. Here's another one. This was addressed to the Queen. I am going to predict.

25:18 that this is going to be spun into a high-speed rail is good we need more of that we can't rely on aviation and what if this thing keeps on blowing for another year? Wait until his neighbor goes off. That's what I mean. We've seen a consistent consistent attacks on aviation, you know, with how much fun is it to fly? I mean, please, with all the security and all the bullcrap, it's no fun to fly. They make it unfriendly. By the way, Chinese government has contracted, papers have been signed to build bullet trains in California. I'm just saying. Built by China? Yep.

26:01 The US has looked to China for help building railroads ever since Chinese laborers laid down the tracks for the Transcontinental Railroad in the 1860s. The coolie slaves? Now California hopes a partnership with the Middle Kingdom can do for 21st century high-speed rail. High speed rail is a scam. Well, that would be, this is exactly what I said. This is the scam. You know they're talking about a high speed bullet train from China to London? I'm not kidding. They want these things... Like an accident waiting to happen. But you know what, when you say to someone, you know, I had dinner last night with a couple of people, you say, you know, I think that they're really just trying to make trains more popular, which of course would, you know, it's just another way to get everybody back to work. Not saying that's necessarily a bad thing, but everyone will say, you know, I would rather take the train. I'm like, oh yeah? Ever seen a train wreck? But you know, no one gives a shit, right, when you say that.

27:01 They are, oh the train sounds much safer, I'd much rather take the train. I said it takes two days. They're going to do this high-speed rail between Los Angeles and San Francisco and I looked at the plans, it's going to take you three hours. It's a 45 minute flight! And it's not going to be cheaper. You can't do it for less than Virgin America's 75 bucks. No, it's not going to be cheaper. So 75 you can sometimes get $59 on that flight. No, it's going to be well, all you have to do. Here's all you have to do is you have to look at the Amtrak because I have always considered taking this thing. The Amtrak train from Emeryville, Oakland, San Francisco, wherever you want to call it, to advertising, whatever you want to call it, all the way up to Seattle.

27:52 Yeah, and you you have to take a sleeper because it's a 24-hour trip You can drive from San Francisco to Seattle in about 14 to 15 hours max That's what stopping and you know taking a crap and eating dinner And the train takes 24 hours. I know it's a step backwards. It's Atlas shrugged reinvigorated What You're just hard up for turning the Atlas Shrug thing into any opportunity. Well, it's the Taggart Transcontinental. That's what they're building. It's so obvious. Anyway, the point is, when I'm in Europe, I like to take the train because it's a... For one thing, the cities are amenable for trains because there's a bunch of packed-in cities. The United States is not amenable. In Europe, it's not 400 miles between every little city. It's, you know, they're all over the place. It's doable.

28:49 Yeah, I mean the whole size of Holland isn't even 400 miles wide. What is it anyway? It's like 40. That's a little more than 40. So a train makes sense. But here it doesn't make any sense. We have too many wide open spaces. And so it's the easiest thing to do is to fly. And I think anyone who travels around the world or travels a lot knows this and knows the impracticality of these trains. Or even if you've priced them out. I have taken the train a number of times. I've taken some fancy trains. I took the Crescent from Washington, D.C. to Atlanta, Georgia one year because I was in New York or I was in Washington, D.C., I guess it was in Washington, D.C., and I had to go to the Condex in Atlanta, and I couldn't really get a route. It was cheaper to take the train as slow as it was because this was a practical consideration. I'd have to have spent the night in Washington, D.C., which was going to cost me like 100 bucks.

29:44 The train, the overnight or sleeper car, plus the cost of the flight, offset by the cost of the flight, was about 25 bucks cheaper and I slept on the train, saved the hotel and I got in the next morning in Atlanta. But it was a long, long trip, but it was kind of amusing and you got fed. And people always say, well at least you'll see something. At least you'll see something of the landscape. It was night. Yeah, exactly. If they threw some hookers on board, I'd be inclined. Yeah, that's not happening anytime soon. But anyway, so in Europe, I do like to look at the scenery on a regular train. The high-speed train, the irony of those, you don't see anything because they're in a trench.

30:25 Yeah, exactly. They are in a trench. They're in a trench and so they put them in a trench so cars won't interfere with the passage and people and kids can't throw rocks at them because in the United States, can you imagine? Here comes the heist. You think you can hit it, Billy? I mean everywhere in the world the car carriers have cars on them in the United States They're covered with first they were covered with like plastic now. They're covered with steel So the cars are inside cuz kids all over the country, you know in the middle of nowhere USA So rocks the cars is oh look at the Mercedes. He hit the Mercedes Mercedes, all right! Good job! You have to put these things in a trench. In Europe they do it for, not because of the kids like they would have to here, but they just do it because they like the speed down there.

31:19 Sorry, any reason to play Ozzy Osbourne is good enough, right? Yeah, pretty much. Anyway, so... Let me just take off... I'm boring you stiff, so I'm going to tell them why I'm not speaking to them. Yeah, you are. I'm so bored now. I go from Hanover to Croatia occasionally on the train. And when I go to see Seabit, I'll go to visit my publisher in Croatia and I could fly, but I'd rather take the train because it's a good day trip. It takes like nine hours. It would take me about a half an hour to fly. But I get a good view and it's kind of relaxing. I don't mind doing it, but I don't see it working in the United States under any circumstances, except along the Eastern seaboard between Philadelphia, Boston, Washington, D.C., and New York. So there's one more theory I have for you.

32:06 Today, and I've not heard if it has been delayed or not due to the volcanic ash cloud. Today launching from Cape Canaveral, the X-37B space vehicle. Have you heard about this little ditty, John? Yeah, that's supposed to be our next generation. Yeah, well it's an Air Force... machine. It looks kind of like a... It looks like a mini space shuttle with like teeny wings. Of course it's quite secretive. It has a payload bay and it's very unclear if there's anything or what would be in the payload bay or sorry, the experiment bay. They don't have... It's just not as big as the other one so it's not going to hold that much. Oh, it's very small. It's a... Well, you don't need much. So maybe they just wanted clear skies for this thing.

32:57 Look out, here it comes! It's out of control! I'm just saying, look, by Thursday's show I guarantee you we'll know a hell of a lot more. Something is up. Aviators are getting pissed off. This was a government controlled operation, not an aviation Shut down aviators did not call for this no aviators saying it was really dangerous this blue sky blue clear sky beautiful weather you even keep prop planes at lower altitude out of the sky

33:34 You know, can you imagine how great it would have been if they just said, all right, we're going to let all general aviation, anyone who can fly VFR in this beautiful weather, you can, you know, I know guys who've got twin engine props, turbo props, maybe that will be a problem, but at low altitude, they can take 10 passengers. We could have really done a lot of good. So I'm thinking what you want is one of these, you want a, just to see what would happen. Because you don't want to do it with a person, so you have to have a robotic, some plane that you can control remote control, you can use remote control like you would with a predator. So you take off like a little Piper Cub off of a landing strip in France.

34:16 I can tell you. I know what will happen. I know what these guys do. Let me give you the scenario, then you tell me. You put a crash test dummy in it so it looks like somebody's flying the plane and you're flying the thing and it only really has one function is that when the jets come by and they start pointing down, get down, get down, a robotic hand comes up and flips them off. So the wing commander actually told me, he says the Mirage guys, he says they're really nice once and then when you don't comply, the next thing they do is they put their wings underneath yours and will hit upwards so they'll start banging your wings.

34:57 with their mirage wings and then they'll get in front of you and turn on the afterburner. He says... And melt your plane. No, you know, you won't. That's what I said. I said, no, no, you won't melt, but you will land. He says when that happens, when one of those mirages turns on the afterburner in your face, when they hit you in the face, no, you will definitely land. So that's what's going to... But these guys are nasty. Can you imagine the wing underneath yours going tick, tick, tick? You know, that's frightening. Yeah, I would think. You don't want any of that. Any of it. Oops, not chewing off. Hey, I only have one just moving along here since we really don't have any information other than it's weird. I have one little ditty on poppies for today's early morning service and it was so funny when I heard this. Someone sent this clip to me from I think it's the BBC.

35:51 This is actually a very sad case of a British serviceman who's in Afghanistan, who's vehicle was blown up by an anti-tank mine, not an IED, but an anti-tank mine. But listen to what he says about the Afghan police. Carl Klaus. So I'm just in Carl's living room at the moment. Massive 50-inch telly on one side of the room. And as I walk to the other side, there's a picture of Carl and his mates smiling, sat around on their armoured vehicle. This, though, was taken just a few hours before Carl's life changed forever. Carl, thanks for having us over today. Yeah, it's fine. So just start by telling us what happened to you that day. Our vehicle.

36:50 It's a anti-tank mine. Flipped it on its right hand side. I suffered over 20 injuries and eventually one of them resulted in my left leg have to be amputated below the knee. So how has life changed for you since then? By the way, great question. Well, walking sucks, bitch. Oh man, yeah, here it comes. I can't run. I struggle to walk up and down hills. I'm going out on weekends, going to nightclubs, playing sport, doing everything that 21-year-olds do really and then all that came to it. A hole. As I'm sure you know, a lot has been said, hasn't it, about whether troops are given good enough kit. Do you think they are? Well, the vehicle I was in when we hit the mine, the only armour basically was a 5mm belly plate on the EWMIC, which obviously to an anti-tank mine is nothing. If I was in a Mastiff, I could safely say that I'd be talking to you now with two legs.

37:47 We were promised vehicles, new vehicles. We just let down time after time after time again. Obviously the general election is coming up in a matter of weeks. What do you think whoever gets into government should do about Afghanistan? I'd pull out. When I was on convoy in Afghanistan, the Afghan police were on heroin. We were going to check. There you go. Did you hear it? Yeah, the Afghan police are on heroin. They're all on heroin. Of course they are. They're all stoned. Yeah. But it's just like, it's just a shocker. It's just glossed over. It's like, Oh, Oh, they're on. Oh, okay. That's no problem. Nobody knows how to glom onto the good, you know, the reporters today, especially the broadcast journalists. They can't, they, they, they're so self-absorbed or something. They're not listening. They don't hear these, these little comments that you would normally jump on and say, what?

38:38 They're all on heroin? And then you'd go right into that form of questioning. You start asking about the poppies and how did they get the heroin? Where's the heroin? You'd go right into it, but they don't even hear it. It's weird. I'm just trying to clear up a couple things right off the bat. You know what we've been talking about? How naked is now porn? And so I see the redefinitions of common day usages. Right. So it's theme of ours. It's getting really, really bad. This this report speak new speak. Yeah, exactly. Double speak. Is it new speaker? Double speak. I think it's new speak. Whatever. CNN releases a report titled Porn for the Blind. Porn for the blind. I saw that. I'll just play a little bit of it since you've seen it.

37:47 We were promised vehicles, new vehicles. We just let down time after time after time again. Obviously the general election is coming up in a matter of weeks. What do you think whoever gets into government should do about Afghanistan? I'd pull out. When I was on convoy in Afghanistan, the Afghan police were on heroin. We were going to check. There you go. Did you hear it? Yeah, the Afghan police are on heroin. They're all on heroin. Of course they are. They're all stoned. Yeah. But it's just like, it's just a shocker. It's just glossed over. It's like, Oh, Oh, they're on. Oh, okay. That's no problem. Nobody knows how to glom onto the good, you know, the reporters today, especially the broadcast journalists. They can't, they, they, they're so self-absorbed or something. They're not listening. They don't hear these, these little comments that you would normally jump on and say, what?

38:38 They're all on heroin? And then you'd go right into that form of questioning. You start asking about the poppies and how did they get the heroin? Where's the heroin? You'd go right into it, but they don't even hear it. It's weird. I'm just trying to clear up a couple things right off the bat. You know what we've been talking about? How naked is now porn? And so I see the redefinitions of common day usages. Right. So it's theme of ours. It's getting really, really bad. This this report speak new speak. Yeah, exactly. Double speak. Is it new speaker? Double speak. I think it's new speak. Whatever. CNN releases a report titled Porn for the Blind. Porn for the blind. I saw that. I'll just play a little bit of it since you've seen it.

39:27 There are plenty of racy pictures for people who can see, but if you're blind, this may be the only way to cop a feel. What? Raised images of naked bodies with braille descriptions alongside. Some are calling it porn for the blind. There you go. So there's basically this braille book and they've got people naked, you know, actually artistic pictures of people naked. And this whole report is about porn for the blind. Does it arouse you? Does it make you horny? It's crazy. How'd you get that voice? Does it make you horny? That's good. Thank you. That's how I talk to Mickey. Does it make you horny? That's what I heard, yes. Yeah, it really works by the way. Apparently a huge turn on.

40:21 Oh man. Yeah, you're right. The lack of chemtrails is helping you out. So are we done with this topic? Yeah, you want to do Haiti now or later because that's my other good one. Oh Well, let's see. How are we doing? You can do it now if you I mean what's going on in Haiti this Besides the ongoing scam. Well the skin. Yeah, the scam does continue I'll give you three news articles and then I'll play a little bit of a clip which is just too funny. So first of all Bill Clinton is downplaying the possibility of corruption, sidetracking, rebuilding and earthquake devastated Haiti. He keeps speaking at these conferences where they're going to decide how to spend the 8 billion dollars to rebuild it. He had a meeting at the University of Miami with the Clinton Global Initiative. We know one thing for sure, if you like the gunfight that's going on in Northwest Mexico, you'll love Haiti 10 years from now. If that's what thrills you.

41:23 This horrible chaos from Monterey to the border, you will just love Haiti if you walk away from it. So now it's justifying the total takeover of the country. Then Clinton and Bush, and I wish I had audio from this, maybe someone can find it for me. It was a letter to the Democratic and Republican leaders, but it would be so funny as a sound drop, provided to the Associated Press, the friends of the CIA. The former president say, please buy clothes from Haiti. You know, those people who work for $3 a day, please buy clothes from Haiti. They need help. Don't send your cash, buy their clothes.

42:12 It's unbelievable. That is pretty bad. And then a Snora, one of our producers, was listening to a Nationals game the other day for the Giants, San Francisco Giants, even though he's Norwegian, he's a big Giants fan. And he says he heard an ad, which we have to find, I only got the email this morning, didn't have time to research it. Quote, all of April month is Haiti toothbrush donation month. What? What? It's Haiti Toothbrush Donation Month. Send us your toothbrush. I don't understand. This thing is out of control. Shyster show up and take advantage of people's goodwill and generosity. So then the Red Cross gets put on the spot. The Red Cross, of course, you know, how many millions went to the Red Cross to help Haiti?

43:08 And of course, the Red Cross is like, if you look at the video that, or the sparse video that is showing up from Haiti, ominously absent is Red Cross. So here is one of the elitist bitches from the Red Cross who's sitting in her mahogany office and listen to what she has to say. She's President Gail McGovern. Why people are saying they don't see the Red Cross on the ground in Haiti? Go ahead, Gail. Why don't you tell us? It would have been so easy for us to send hordes of volunteers to Haiti and then people would see us on the ground. But why bother when we can just keep the money?

43:54 But it would create chaos for so many reasons. First of all, there's no shortage of people that would like to go. And when I made the two trips to Haiti, frankly, I wanted to stay and help. Oh, but I had a luncheon. I couldn't stay. It was impossible. I wanted to help, but I had to leave. But the problem is every person that is there is going to require food. Every person that is there is going to require shelter. And it's just creating more mouths to feed. And as it turns out, we would have to fly people from all over the United States. With these things called airplanes, it's really difficult. To Haiti, and that is not a good use of our donors' dollars. No, no, no, no. We need to invest that into our office and into our corporate fleet. Can you believe what this woman is saying? She's unbelievable. And she does not stop.

44:47 What we're doing instead is we have a core group of American Red Cross employees there in Haiti that are helping with material logistics, ensuring that trucks are being loaded with supplies. And then we are relying on the Haitian Red Cross, the tens of thousands of Haitian Red Cross volunteers to distribute the food. So I have another YouTube video, which unfortunately has no sound and it's these Red Cross operatives on the ground and you literally see the guys putting on like these Red Cross like you know plastic vests. Hey, you're Red Cross now. Oh, okay. And you see them setting up tents and it's the funniest thing because they're like they're hammering pegs into the ground, they're hammering on their hands, they're missing the pegs. It's like a bunch of boneheads. They don't have

45:39 anyone on the ground this woman's full of crap she's lying and this has a lot of advantages to it first of all they speak Creole second of all they know the countryside third of all creates fewer mouths to feed and very importantly it's psychologically empowering this isn't our... John we need to psychologically empower the poor Haitians who are about to be washed away Wow is this incredible or what? I don't think psychological empowerment is top priority at the moment. I'm losing my leg!

46:16 Let me empower you. We have to be very respectful of the people that live there and respectful of our counterparts that make up the Haitian Red Cross. And we want to make sure that when we leave, that there is a thriving, sustainable Haitian Red Cross to help the people of Haiti. Wait a minute, I thought there was already 10,000 people there who are already thriving and know what they're doing. There's your doublespeak. Unbelievable. So why not put the Red Cross logo on all of your supplies, the next question is. Well, I think that's a very good question. You could identify that your money is actually going there and is being... I have heard from people that have been on the ground in Haiti that they don't see evidence of the American Red Cross.

47:00 And there's actually a very good reason for that. They're probably seeing our tents, our tarps, our food and supplies and emergency relief kits wherever they go. But we have not chosen to slap our brand on all of that supplies and on the tents and on the tarps. And the reason is we didn't want to hold up sending relief items into Haiti and put the logo on it. That eats up time. It eats up time. It eats up time! She was there! First she says she was there, then I've heard from people there. In a crisis like what is happening in Haiti, we wanted to send things as quickly as possible and get it on the ground there for relief. So where are they? And the other thing is, putting our logo on people's temporary homes

47:58 It just doesn't feel right. And we are all about... Meanwhile, she's wearing a Red Cross brooch. encrusted with diamonds. She is really? Yeah, she's wearing a Red Cross brooch. Oh yeah. Encrusted with diamonds? Looks like it. People of Haiti have what they need, not only physically but also psychologically. So that's why we elected not to brand everything that's out there, but I can assure you that our presence is being felt by the people of Haiti. Yeah, the lack of it. That's a, you know, what a bunch of bull crap. It's not like she's saying that we're, you know, our money is going to these people. They kept the money! You know, there's a good, I think it was on 60 Minutes, I can't remember which, and I don't know if I have the clip. I know I don't have an audio clip this week.

48:49 They were showing how they're moving a lot, you know, they're putting up tent cities. But instead of putting up anywhere near the town of Port-au-Prince, they've got them two or three miles away where there's no supplies, there's no water, there's nothing, and they're putting these tents up. And they went on and showed, and the people are complaining, saying, what are we supposed to do out here? They're not even, they don't want to go. They're staying away from it. They don't want to go, right. They said, just screw this. And so they would rather not be there. But meanwhile, they, discover there's all kinds of open space in and around Port-au-Prince, it just needs to be cleared and they're doing that and just putting up UN offices. The United Nations putting in really nice trailers and they showed it, they said power supplies and you know generators and trailers and you know... Beer kegs, pool halls... It's a party! And meanwhile the people, you can take the people, get them out of here, they're in the way. Move!

49:46 It's just unbelievable. It's just un-fucking-believable. It drives me nuts. People are just waiting for him to die. What will it be, John? Two, three weeks maybe? Thousands die from rain floods in Haiti! And we'll be like, aww, if only we could have gotten to him sooner. We really tried. I would like anybody out there who listens to this show who catches local reports, because we only get a few. But we do get them. But if you get a local reporter that happens to give one of these reports from Haiti with this, you know, hey, I don't see any Red Cross or anything like that. If you can find some way to make a clip, and I would advise, of course, everybody to own a Zoom H2 recorder, which you can hook to your television set and make MP3s right from the audio feed without having to go through a miserable experience.

50:42 and they're very inexpensive and handy. You can also use them to bootleg rock concerts. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, cool. Yeah, that's, actually I use my iPhone memo recorder. It works pretty well, it doesn't sound too crappy. It's not that much worse than a line recording. Pretty good. Oh, there we go. As usual, it's time to lose John. Yeah, stream is back up. Okay. You know that time Warner Cable thing you've got stinks. You know, it's the weirdest thing because I have all kinds of network monitoring and it literally it just drops out. They just it just disconnects and it's it's the router disconnecting from the entire network.

51:30 And it's one of their... Well, once you get a different router, maybe it's your router. It's one of these... I don't know, maybe. It's one of these router... It was their newest one. I said get me the best thing. The DOCSIS router that Time Warner gave you? Who made it? Do you have a second? I gotta look under the table. Yeah, we all have a second. Since the stream's running, I'll keep people entertained with my ribald tails. It's Netgear. It's a Netgear. That's pretty good. It's a Netgear? Yeah. And this is the one that Time Warner gave you? Yeah, it's a Netgear that plugs directly into the cable and then it has Wi-Fi built in and five Ethernet ports. Well let's get you a better one. If you think it's that, I mean I'll talk to Netgear. I don't think it is. I mean what I'm seeing is it's literally just the cable disconnecting periodically. I know it makes no sense.

52:26 But that's not a DOCSIS, where was your DOCSIS modem? You have to have a... No, no, it's built into this thing. It's built into it. And before every show, I disconnect the... I turn the power off, I let it completely drain of all residual power, I plug it back in so I know that it's not overloaded or anything, which actually seems to... It might... It looks like it. Who knows? On Thursday, it dropped out three times. I don't know, John. I mean, I just don't know. And it doesn't have... Okay, well I think my plan... Maybe... Let's see, I don't even know that Netgear made a DOCSIS modem. Yeah, it's brand new. It doesn't have a model number on it anywhere. It's a small little box.

53:06 Yeah, Netgear's DOCSIS, blah blah blah. Netgear Cable Gateway earns DOCSIS 3.0 certification from Cable Labs December 14th. That's probably what you guys, CG3200D. It's too new, is that what you're saying? Well, I don't know, but let's talk to Netgear about it. This can't continue. Did you see, I know you probably didn't, did you see Bill Maher? I have clips. Oh good because I got so angry I got so angry at that show Wait a minute before you do that. I we let's play the beer bill the beer mar clips In the proper order I think there I think I sent you in the right order Let me see to find your little scent box here. I've got the Chinaman thing

53:54 Yeah, well here's the here's the okay. Here's what the thing they got me irked was Mara on breeders You might want to just play that this is probably probably part of what got you irked There was a lot that got me irked Situation where I think the concern shouldn't just be about people such a large proportion not paying federal income taxes They pay all the taxes you mentioned, but they haven't got the income. Okay, what are they gonna buy? but the IRS has sort of become an organ of social engineering in America, which it never used to be. That is kind of a big new thing. And they bribe you to get a tax credit. But why if you have a child, you get a tax credit? Shouldn't you get a crack tax debit? I mean, that kid's going to... This is the guy who has no kids, right?

54:41 Yeah, no, he's got no kids. He hates children. He once on his on his show, Politically Incorrect, talked about how how it wasn't a bad idea to beat kids. Seriously. And the guy is he's and this show, by the way, is interesting because he just has no balance on the on the panel. Everybody is a very left. He had two Brits, two British people telling us we need VAT in our country. Get out of my country, you bitches. And the Laura Flanders from Grit TV who's just a... I... Yeah, no, don't say it. That word, yes. I was yelling at my television. Let me play the rest of the Breeders clip. It has like 30 seconds left. It's worth it. It cost everybody a lot of money.

55:28 Why, I mean, really, seriously, why is a mortgage deductible? Why are all the, you know, why are churches taxing them? Why do they make all these judgments about what's good and what's bad? Why do some people get a break? Why are renters and breeders... Bill, there's a bigger problem. Renters and breeders. A bigger problem which is taxing income. We should be taxing consumption more and income less. There it is! Oh yeah! That's what most other countries are on. These damn Brits. Nah, I got nothing against my brothers and sisters from Gitmo Nation East, but these two jabronis. Now, let me bring up something that's premise-based. Marr goes off on this saying they've become social engineers recently. Recently? There's always been a deduction for dependents since they actually started adding, you know, since the 1920s, and there's always been a deduction from, a mortgage deduction since the 1920s. I mean, this is not new. What do you think, was it introduced last week?

56:32 So I mean, so his history is all screwed up. So but here's what the show actually went off the track very early during his monologue. He was he was about to in fact, he did say the word Chinaman. Yeah, that was I have a clip of here is the Chinaman clip and it rattled him. He, I think you have not seen this week's show, Find, you got another few days to see it because they rerun it a million times on HBO. He was physically rattled by his own gaffe. Yeah, it's like a racist. He was mulling this over for the entire show. Play the Chinaman clip. He's a racist. He knows it's Obama's fault, he just can't figure out how. The context is the president bowing to

57:22 to the Chinaman. Yeah, to the Chinaman. This week they were very upset with Obama because he had his big nuclear summit and he apparently bowed a little to the Chinese president. Well that's what you do. He's a Chinaman, not a Chinaman. He's a man from China. Whatever the... Please don't write me. Anyway, you know. Yeah, he's a racist. He's a racist. We know he's an ageist. Yeah. Yeah, no, he's a racist. Of course he is. He's a terrible guy. And a big part of the show was about

57:58 Which he consistently calls the tea baggers. Tea baggers, tea baggers, tea baggers. He will not say tea party which is the proper, which is what they are. To such an extent that one of his guests actually said the tea bag party by accident because he didn't hammer it. This was total mind control. Tea bagger, tea bagger. And then the whole, I don't know if you have that clip or not, but the whole panel discussion starts off with, well we find out that what this is really about is people don't hate their government, they just hate black people in government. Oh yeah, he harps on this. What is that based on? It's based on nothing. It's, it's, it's, he's creating racism. This guy is horrible. Get him off the air.

58:42 Do you have any more clips from this? No, I just took two. I can't take much of that character. I just want to say that they have the panel and they bring on a guest and this is what frightened me the most because here it is. Here's your next war on terror bit. This is Lawrence Bender. This is the guy who produced An Inconvenient Truth. He now has a new movie which of course was launched at Sundance. Oh, it's a beautiful movie! John, I saw it at Sundance and it was so impressive, it gave me chills. It really is just, it frightened me. Bill Maher actually called his movies more frightening than those that Wes Craven makes. And he's made this new movie Countdown to Zero. And Countdown to Zero, which of course was screened for, I think the president might even have been there.

59:34 is the inconvenient truth version of terrorists have nuclear weapons. That's the new thing. That's what this whole nuclear summit is about. Is about terrorists have nukes, terrorists will set off nuclear weapons. Now news reports, oh, if anyone attacks Iran, nukes will go off all over America. We've got our dirty bombs, nukes everywhere. Terrorists have nuclear weapons. Don't you think that if terrorists had nuclear weapons they would have set them off by now? Oh yeah! I mean, kaboom! Please! They could have set them off by now. What's the point of waiting?

1:00:11 It's... you know... but the whole thing is just to scare you that terrorists have nuclear weapons. They've got them. Countdown to Zero, the scariest movie ever. More sca... More scary than Inconvenient Truth. Now, from the makers of Inconvenient Truth, we bring you Countdown to Zero. Put your head between your knees and kiss your ass goodbye. You're all fucked. You're doing a lot of voices today. I'm feeling good. Maybe there's something to that theory about the... And it's always that Jeff Skoll guy who's paying for this. Isn't he like one of the eBay founders? Maybe, I don't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's always financing this crap.

1:00:57 Yeah, Jeff's you know, it makes money it entertains the public which scares them I mean, you see what like you said Wes Craven and this guy they're the same, you know Just the same dude just a different version of the same thing, you know here is scary scary movie You know and there's a fiction fiction. I mean like inconvenient truth, you know bullshit Yay Nice. All right. So let's talk about some of the supporters of this show because they've helped us out tremendously with our media assassination, which I think we're doing a fine job of this morning. Well, as you call that media.

1:01:35 Yeah, we have had some good contributions this week, especially at the producers level. But we've got to, let's run through a few of the people that sent us some money and support, did us for this week. Anastasia Parov in Mississauga, Ontario, $100. Jason Williams, Pittsburgh, California, once more from Jason Williams and Paul, Nariman, the time we're calling out our friend Eric Fought F-O-U-G-H-T from Brentwood, California for being a douchebag. He's a regular listener and he's yet to donate. Damn!

1:02:17 Okay, now we have a lot of, a few 5510s, actually only two which is odd. Robert Campbell, two nickels on the dime from Walworth, New York with a long note. He's been an episode one listener, has always been remiss until enough to donate. He's heard stories about the karma. He needs the karma apparently, he needs some. It brings to mind a story, I think it reminds you of your plane. A number of years ago, my wife and I bought a timeshare. This turned out to be one of the reasons we were in debt. Enough to want to sell it now. We were contacted by a few different companies to sell and each want money up front for marketing slash advertising cause never pay up front money for anything unless you're hiring an ad agency.

1:03:03 One such company, and most of those work from the percentage of the buy anyway. One such company did get $257 from us and only fed us lies! My donation of $55.10 is 10% of what I will donate when it does sell, okay? Nice, and yes, my aircraft is still for sale at controller.com. It's the November 277 Delta Sierra. I'll move it for almost anything. You know, I had a guy try and there's like some university that was needed a plane to put an electric engine in. I actually talk with him for a while. It's like, I'll just sell the body. You will keep the engine. It's always good. Please.

1:03:45 I need to sell this thing. It's like the aviation market, if you haven't noticed, is getting worse. Yeah. Something about not being able to fly at all. Nelson Ferrer, a new Rochelle, New York two nickels on the diamond behalf of Indira Hoffman, the sexiest, most courageous and strong wife in the universe. Baby, hot, hot, hot, hot. Sean Smith, Ashland City, Tennessee, 5011. Testing the Karma Theory, I'll let you know. Looking forward to my happy... Let me slide that over. Ending. Oh. Sorry about that. Looking forward to his happy ending. Sliding over indeed. Leith Morrison, Brussels, Ontario. Says he's paying us in Canadian, which is worth more than American money apparently. Alan Boe is Langley, British Columbia.

1:04:38 50, and then Joe Piccini, Larry Corpy, Pelsmacher, Neil Lemma, and, they're all part of the Knights program, I just thought I'd mention it, that 50 comes up every month. And Neil Lemma and Michael Rieger, normally I don't mention this, but them along with Pelsmacher actually, got a $30 monthly plan, which is nice. Other notes? None. Well, let's just thank our executive producers Werner Flipson who donated $333.33, AJ Tissier, also the Magic Threes, and then Matthew Hawking who donated $333 even

1:05:29 But he did it at 3.30 a.m. in the morning, which gives you extra bonus points. And then our associate executive producers, iShare Media, who... Now Eric DeShill says he's a knight, so should we just go ahead and do it? Well... Okay. What the hell, John? iShare Media! If you are just one person or an entire group, please kneel before us. Uh, John, you better get it out. There you go. Ooh, yours is sharp today. Due to your total donation equaling at least $1,000, we hereby knight you Sir iShare Media! Knight of the No Agenda Roundtable, please enjoy your hookers and blow! Hey, John, sheath that thing, will ya? Hey, hey! Oh, I can't get it in. There we go. So, um...

1:06:28 Everybody should try to understand what we're doing here on the show. We are publicly supported. We're listener supported. We only are listener supported. We take no other money any other way. As long as we're getting paid to do the show from the listeners, we will do the show for the listeners and pretty much try to keep them educated and informed from the stuff, the research that we uncover. Now, you have to remember we do this twice a week, which is four hours a week, and if you go to a movie or something, you see two hours, you went to two movies, you think about it as a couple of movies in terms of your time. It helps people who are commuters, just really listen to more, listen to by more commuters than anybody else.

1:07:09 and just think about what benefits you get out of it compared to a movie. And help us out here. Go to noagendashow.com, dvorak.org slash NA or dvorak.org slash NAS. Also channeldvorak.com slash NA and you can find different programs you can donate in your area. And I'd just like to also thank Nina Kristen Hetland as our third associate executive producer for donating $200 to the cause on track I guess getting looking better for full-time Dedication to the program for me it really will take selling the plane And for you John, I think just need more money. Well, don't send us toothbrushes. Okay? No, no, this is all we need is cash. Yes, we do and

1:08:00 By the way, I also have a letter going out this week thanking all the people who donated to No Agenda Stream. And in the letter, and people in the mailing list will also get this letter, there is a direct deposit. People every once in a while say, you know, I don't like PayPal, or they can't get to PayPal like in India. Although, you know, it's mostly Indians that tell me that they're cheap in India anyway, and nobody cares. But you can do direct deposit through a wire transfer, and that's... Probably a good solution to a lot of people. Hey John, I have a little trivia for you Yeah, like do a little trivia for a second. I know but go for it. Okay Here we go Who said this? Haiku is an awakening of the spirit away from technocratic rationality away from the sophistication attention-seeking and glitter back to basics our time is in need of simplicity

1:08:56 Al Gore. No, no. Who is Jerry Brown? No, come on. Who is Clinton? No! Who is Haiku Herman? Oh, I knew this. Haiku Herman van der Rumpuy. Yes, he has finally released his book of haikus. This is the president of the United States of Europe, who Nigel Farage has likened to having the personality of a damp dishcloth. Quoted, he actually quoted Charles de Gaulle at the release of his Haiku book and saying, gentlemen, do I look like a dictator?

1:09:38 Which I think is just mint. Is that what he said? Yes, oh yeah. I look like a dictator. I don't have the audio of it. Actually he does. Of course he looks like a dictator. He totally looks... He looks like that Ceaucescu character that was a dictator in Romania. As De Gaulle, although I cannot compare myself with him, I would say, gentlemen, do I look like a dictator? So he released this book of haikus. I will read one to you and then I will give you his Flemish and French reading of another one which I will translate for you on the fly. Because this is coming from the President of the United States of Europe, representing over 400 million people, soon to have his own army. A haiku by Herman van Rompuy. In the nearby ditch,

1:10:32 Toads mating passionately inaugurate spring. It's beautiful, isn't it? Okay, another one. Frost has now hardened. The folds of winter soil. Tomorrow it will thaw. It sounds like the banal post that my son, if you go to Twitter, slash 12 too. That's exactly what it sounds like. He just puts up these stupid commentaries and he's been doing it. I don't know how I can maintain this, by the way. Let's listen to some of his own readings and I'll translate it for you.

1:11:15 So he's actually saying the final part of the kaiku has to be a point, it has to be a paradox. Thank you, Herman. Two days gone. The world has changed. The fruit tree blossoms. It's beautiful! I have tears in my eyes. This guy needs counseling. And he's going to read it again. Gone for two days. The world has changed. The fruit tree blossoms. And if that wasn't enough, let's do it in French.

1:12:01 Le verger en fleur. Do it again! Absent deux jours, un monde qui a changé. Le verger en fleur. Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes! Herman, you are a genius! Standing ovation. That's what we're up against. The President of the United States of Europe, ladies and gentlemen. That's the guy who is going to rule the world. Gotta love it. Alright, so let's go into some clips. Here's a good one. There's this guy I'm listening to. He's a new senator from Nebraska, your favorite state. I like Nebraska. Boys Club.

1:12:56 Oh yes, of course. Boys Town. Boys Town. Boys Town. Sorry, not Boys. There's no Boys Club anymore. Now it's the Boys and Girls Club. Mike Johans, Nebraska Senator, he's on C-SPAN during a vote and they're grilling him about the economy and what can be done about this new... And he's talking tough. So play the... Blanche? No, no. Pre-Glass-Steagall. Doesn't go... This thing doesn't... Just play that clip. Pre. Pre. Arc Illinois from Diane, Independent. Go ahead, please. Uh, yeah. Oh, this is the C-SPAN call-in show? Yeah, no, by the way, this woman calling in is hilarious. I think she's, I think personally that she's in the tank. But whatever the case is, she actually makes kind of drunken sense. And of course he picks up the ball after that. Nice. Arc Illinois from Diane, Independent. Go ahead, please.

1:13:52 Yes, my question is, is if we don't rein in too big to fail the way these financial institutions are intertwined, we're never going to let them fail whether there's a Republican or a Democrat in the White House. It doesn't matter. We're going, the American people are going down the tubes. watching both parties sell us out for contributions from these banks. She's my new hero. I love this woman. I have not heard it said that simply. I know, it's like I was stunned myself. This is what needs to be corrected.

1:14:40 Diane, you could not be more right. One of the first, I'm a fairly new senator, I've only been there about a year and a half, but one of the first votes I had was the second piece of the TARP funding, the federal money that in my judgment has really become a slush fund for every cause out there. I voted against it. I just thought it was the wrong course of action, the wrong direction. Wouldn't it be funny if she said, in the morning? We need to firmly plant a stake in the heart of Too Big to Fail. This idea that you get so big that taxpayers are duty-bound to bail you out is absurd and ridiculous. The only way I believe we can do that is pass a very, very strong piece of legislation here. I do not believe that this current bill goes far enough.

1:15:34 Okay, he's talking tough. It's not going far enough We got it you by the way everyone should note out there and anyone who studies it knows that all the institutions that were too big to fail that were sale Are bigger now than they were before Every too big to fail company is really a lot bigger than it was and they acquired a lot of other companies just become bigger Yeah, and they're huge, but anyway, so this guy's talking tough so meanwhile Somebody comes up, some guy calls in, next, not the next one, but shortly down the line, and talks about Glass-Steagall. Now Glass-Steagall was a bill that was passed during the Great Depression, that came out of the Great Depression along with a lot of other provisos to keep these banks in check.

1:16:18 from getting too big to fail and from banks taking on too many things, selling insurance, selling stocks and doing all kinds of mixed bag of things. It was prohibited. And Glass-Steagall along with the banking acts that kept banks from doing interstate banking and a lot of these other rules and regulations kept everything in check and they were all repealed. Glass-Steagall, the guy makes the mistake of saying Glass-Steagall was from 1999. Glass-Steagall was Eliminated in 1999 by Clinton along with the Democrat, I'm sorry, along with the Republican Congress. So this guy brings up an interesting question. Now listen to what Mr. Get Tough, oh we gotta get tough, we gotta do more. Listen to what his response to this question is.

1:17:02 Next up is Gail on Belgrade, Maine Republican line. Good morning, Gail. Good morning. Senator, I did want to ask you a question. Some of the better accounts that I had read about the genesis of the financial meltdown in 2008, two culprits kept coming up all the time in all the accounts that I read. It was the expansion of The monetary base from the Federal Reserve that created the housing bubble, but the other thing was the repeal of the 1999 Glass-Steagall Act that put up a wall between regular commercial banks where people had FDIC insurance and that you just put your savings in there, and the investment bank.

1:17:54 to become regular banks so they could get tar money. That's because they could not have done that if it wasn't for what this guy calls, by the way, Glass-Seagull. It's Glass-Seagull. It's Glass-Semen. That's what it is. But that was repealed under the Clinton administration, but with the help of a Republican Congress, and I believe it was led by Phil Graham, a Republican senator from Texas at the time. This seemed to give an implicit guarantee to the investment banks that when all these complicated derivatives and collateral debt obligations just collapsed, They give an implicit government guarantee that that happened. We taxpayers bailed out these firms. So when we bailed out AIG, it allowed the taxpayers to be able to have AIG pay Goldman Sachs and foreign banks. Isn't it time that we re-institute Glass-Steagall to prevent that from happening again? And why isn't it a part of this new bill?

1:18:49 I would not go there. Let me offer a general thought. Okay, you can stop it. Now he just starts talking about something else. Yeah, this asshole was talking tough a minute ago. And then when it comes to Glass-Steagall, which I agree with, if it was in place, we probably wouldn't have this meltdown. But this guy, because there's some corruption within the Republican Party. And of course, when they mentioned Phil Graham as being behind the repeal of Glass-Steagall, and if you start looking into Phil Graham and his and his lobbyist wife and check out what they're up to, it's enough to make you throw up.

1:19:25 Guys like this are part of the problem. For those of you wondering what we're doing watching C-SPAN... Somebody's got to watch it. It's what you support us for. So on C-SPAN, there's by the way I still have to get my education I could I was gonna do my educational thing today but now over the weekend CNN ran a education special with this bull The phone had the head of the Department of Education, Obama's guy, Chicago. And unfortunately now it gave me so much more new material that I've got to re-edit all this stuff so it's not going to bore people totally stiff. Or maybe I'll just put the whole thing on a CD, I'm not sure. While you're doing that, John, look up ERB.

1:20:23 DRB no E echo Romeo Bravo it's the education report board who are making pre-k four-year-olds do tests I know I had dinner last night with a with a with a friend and she says, oh we're really worried about this test. I said but your kid's like four. Yeah yeah no it's the ERB test. What is that? I don't know but it's the ERB test. She has to be ready for the test and they're rich. Like four houses like rich rich, head funds rich. And they've got tutors for the four-year-old. Oh, this is sick. Oh, yeah, the ERB. You have to look into these. Educational records. I've got even more to do. Oh, yeah, no, this is awesome. This is fantastic. So we'll do that in a future show. Sorry for the interruption. I think you have more on this.

1:21:14 I got plenty. Yeah, anyway, so but meanwhile listening to Watching some stuff on CNN, but meanwhile they had this on books the books TV thing they do over the weekend to and John by the way I just want people to know this is our life. Okay, so I have a dinner. All right This is one of Mickey's friends her husband runs a hedge firm and Hedge fund and you know she actually had dinner and we can get at that later said so what do you think of this Goldman thing I said yeah don't look over here but anyway I'm on my way and John's like C-SPAN 2 now I'm like oh crap Mickey there's something on C-SPAN 2 and luckily I have the C-SPAN app

1:21:56 So I fire up the C-SPAN app and on the way to dinner we're listening to C-SPAN 2 in the car. I just want, that is our life. That is what we do for you so you don't have to. Right. If we weren't doing this show I can assure you we wouldn't be doing this. We wouldn't be doing that. We're actually ruining our lives doing this stuff. Yeah, exactly. It's like, okay, so here's the thing. Here's the deal. So some months back I saw this woman, Nicole Gelinas. and she uh... finished a book called actually did a book called after the fall and by the way this is an alert to our uh... or book uh... guys who have uh... no agenda bookstore and some other stuff online and they put these books on for people to buy and they take a piece of the uh...

1:22:38 Amazon sales and send us a chunk of that which is very little because Amazon doesn't give me anything But anyway, the book is by Nicole Jelena's called after the fall and it's a deconstruction of the financial crisis saving capitalism from Wall Street and Washington and Then she was interviewing Harry Markopoulos the guy the whistleblower out of the Madoff whistleblower who just released a book naming names called no one would listen And this is another book you should buy. But here's the back story. So I tuned into C-SPAN, this was about a month, month and a half ago, when her book came out and she was giving a lecture to one of the, some foundation or some group of people somewhere. And I was fascinated because she was really interesting. She's done, but she is the nerdiest woman I have probably ever seen in my life, but somehow appealing in some weird way. May I quote from your SMS text message to me, John?

1:23:40 This gal, Nicole, hot ultra nerd girl, real one. You listen to Veronica Belmont and all these different women that are on these podcasts and pod shows, they all call themselves nerd girls or geeks, you know, and none of them are. They play with a few gadgets and they like an iPad and all. This woman is Genuinely the real deal man. It's a real deal. She is such a nerd. It's unbelievable So anyway, so I saw and I said what this is she was but I was fascinated by her material by the way The most interesting thing about she actually has a pro Fed argument that's interesting. She has a nice rack I Didn't notice that to be honest. I'm googling her I

1:24:37 This is our life. Okay, so I'm shocked to see her on again and she's not only on but although she's very unprofessional because she didn't sign off right and a few other things, but she's interviewing Markopoulos and you've all seen him, he's the whistleblower, who is an ultra nerd. I mean, he's a wonk nerd. So we got this nerd. It was a nerd fest. It was nerd porn. Going after each other, she's actually interviewing him, she's on his side on this thing. And it was one of the best, and you should look it up, it was on C-Span, too, it was one of the best interviews I've ever seen because it was no holds barred, not trying to explain anything, just going for it. So let's listen to, I got three clips from this, and let's listen to the first one, which is Markopoulos on bailouts.

1:25:24 as you mentioned, they consider themselves to be sophisticated people. Should we have this differentiation between sophisticated investors and you and me investors? Where the SEC says, for example, if you've got a net worth of more than a million dollars, maybe two million now, and you're making more than $200,000 a year, you're on your own. There's really no consumer protections or investment protections for you. You can invest in all kinds of unregulated stuff. and everyone else has at least some rudimentary protections, although these things need reform as well. Should we even have that separation? No, because sophisticated investors, just because they're wealthy doesn't mean they know the financial capital markets that well.

1:26:08 they deserve a level of protection too. they pay taxes, they're citizens of this nation, we owe them a duty of protection. that would be like saying our armed forces should only protect people that are making less than $200,000 a year. well, they protect all of us in the armed forces. same with our regulators. they shouldn't be differentiating saying, oh, you sophisticated wealthy investors, you're on your own, it's okay for you to get wiped out, we don't care. well, someone should care. there are people too. and they have families, they pay taxes, they donate to charities, and they serve in charitable organizations. Why won't we want to protect those poor people? I mean, the Madoff victims have gotten nothing but a bad deal from the government. They got no protection, they got no sympathy, and now they're getting clawbacks. The people that got protection,

1:26:47 and bailed out with the big corporate entities. How fair is that? They fire more sophisticated entities. Even more. And they got bailed out. So you're saying that the corporations are more sophisticated, they get bailed out, you get people that are making over $200,000 a year, they may have over $2 million in assets, they get no protection, and anybody who's middle class gets plenty of protection. Well, it turned out the middle class didn't get protected any better than the rich people in this country did. Who did get protected? the corporations. So who does our country represent? It seems to represent the corporations. She should throw in a swing line once in a while. Yeah, you know, I stupid. It's a swing line. You know, he's going a lot to. But anyway, Mark Markopoulos is just a he this guy could should be hitting the road as a politician because his stuff is it's very populous. It's very interesting. Let's play number two. Here we go. Take this to

1:27:48 the larger level of what you just talked about, the unfairness of these financial industry bailouts, the perception among regular people that there's free markets meaning failure for me but not for thee if you're big enough and complicated enough. we put in place the right regulations so that we don't have these bailouts next time around, that you could have financial companies go under without bankrupting the rest of the financial system? What does Bernie Madoff and this whole tragic debacle teach us for five years from now, ten years from now? I think the Bernie Madoff scandal teaches us that if you're an individual,

1:28:27 this country does not represent you. it represents corporations, it's pretty clear. i know that the american people are angry as hell because i go out and give speeches and i meet them and the anger is palpable. right. what are they most angry about? they're angry at the bailouts. they don't understand why we bailed out the auto companies, why they weren't allowed to fail. they don't understand why AIG was allowed to exist. fannie mae, fannie mac, they don't understand these bailouts. they don't understand why we rescued the banks. And I don't understand why the banks are paying big bonuses. Why didn't they pay back the bonuses that they earned in the last 10 years? They didn't earn them, they weren't real earnings. Right. If the Madoff victims have these clawbacks where they have to give back the money that they thought they had made, why not the financial institutions as well? How fair is that? The CEOs get to keep the money that they didn't earn and the Madoff victims have to give theirs back.

1:29:16 How fair is that? It's not fair. It just shows the inequality and who does government represent? It certainly doesn't represent us taxpayers. Right. As famously once said by an American president, the business of America is business. Yeah, I think it was Cleveland. Yeah. Okay, anyway, so this guy's on a roll. I'm watching this is really interesting I mean, but he's not saying anything that we don't talk about and that we don't express But he's but he is the guy who busted made off and busted him like years before a decade That's a couple of years a couple years and he's by the way in his book. He apparently names it They talk about this he names a bunch of people that weren't brought up in the in the congressional hearings but the little bit of that is discussed here and that third and last clip and

1:30:01 do you lay out these very good suggestions? what's your realistic assessments? from what you've seen in congress over the past year and a half now, nearly a year and a half since your exposure came to light, the regulatory bill that's before congress right now, this idea of systemic risk regulator, consumer financial protection agency, do you think that they'll get this right? No, they won't because no one's been held accountable in Washington. Not one regulator, not one SEC staffer has been fired. They need to be publicly fired. These people should not have their jobs. There's nothing in the current regulatory scheme that needs to be saved. We need to tear down and build a new one computer system, new people,

1:30:44 that are zealous and properly compensated to find fraud and prevent fraud and protect us taxpayers and right now no accountability zero so you're saying that even if the sdc people that you mentioned by name uh... you know i'm making strong couple other ones who you according to yourself and the inspector general dismissed these findings many times over, they're still working at the SEC? No, many of them have left, but some have been promoted. So if your penalty for screwing up massively, like in a Madoff case, is you get promoted or make more money, that's wrong. Or you go to the private sector. Or you go to the private sector and take a cushy partnership at a big law firm, well that doesn't seem like punishment to me. I want accountability in government. There's none. You have entire agencies that failed this nation. Not one person's been fired.

1:31:30 How shocking is that? Should Americans be outraged? You bet they should be. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. Well, that's being said on C-SPAN 2. And there's another C-SPAN clip that I have to pull because, you know, amidst all of the real news about flights not being to fly in Europe, there's financial hearings going on. that are about this very topic. And the chief of mortgages of JPMorgan Chase, David Lohman, was asked by, I think, Barney Frank, that's why I got to find this, he said, so if mortgage borrowers can't get a mortgage, who do they turn to? So David Lohman says, come to me.

1:32:25 Minutes later, about 50 borrowers from the audience burst through the gates and started surrounding him saying, hey, I'm here! And he ran away. I don't know if they actually aired that or not, but I have to find that. Come to me. And they came to him and he ran away. Coward bastard. Another liar. Yeah, it's just unbelievable. Unbelievable. And then of course the, uh... Don't look over here! Nothing to see here! Ooh, look at that! Is this, uh... Oh, the SEC is suing Goldman Sachs! No one's gonna go to jail! It's like they screwed their customers, so what? Bunch of rich people.

1:33:08 No one's gonna, they might pay a fine, $100 million. There'll be some fines, but the fines will be well-resented. It'll be like you paying a parking ticket. Exactly, $100 million. Here, will you take a check? No problem. That's what it's gonna be. And that's like, even the hedge fund people are like, oh, we're so happy, Goldman's getting, what are you talking about? The scam is $23 trillion. $100 million is not gonna make any difference. Just take that. Here's my check, personal check even. And of course there's another, another to see here moment was on CNBC, which a lot of people, you can get this, I think we have this on the blog, you can read it, look at it. Apparently they brought some guy on, some financial math guy. Wizard. Wizard. He comes on and they put a four quad box up with our friend from the Council on Foreign Relations, Aaron. Oh, of course.

1:33:59 And the guy, these three people, the three people talk and then I guess the fourth guy was sitting in the sidelines. He immediately comes up with the, and they're talking about Goldman Sachs, and one of them is Kramer, Jim Kramer. And so the guy says, well, now I guess I can talk because after all these public relations people for Goldman Sachs are done. So what's all really all you said? Wow. Kramer goes ballistic. I'm not a public relationship with Goldman Sachs. I'm offended. I'm offended. I'm offended. Oh, there we go again. The first secret about

1:33:08 No one's gonna, they might pay a fine, $100 million. There'll be some fines, but the fines will be well-resented. It'll be like you paying a parking ticket. Exactly, $100 million. Here, will you take a check? No problem. That's what it's gonna be. And that's like, even the hedge fund people are like, oh, we're so happy, Goldman's getting, what are you talking about? The scam is $23 trillion. $100 million is not gonna make any difference. Just take that. Here's my check, personal check even. And of course there's another, another to see here moment was on CNBC, which a lot of people, you can get this, I think we have this on the blog, you can read it, look at it. Apparently they brought some guy on, some financial math guy. Wizard. Wizard. He comes on and they put a four quad box up with our friend from the Council on Foreign Relations, Aaron. Oh, of course.

1:33:59 And the guy, these three people, the three people talk and then I guess the fourth guy was sitting in the sidelines. He immediately comes up with the, and they're talking about Goldman Sachs, and one of them is Kramer, Jim Kramer. And so the guy says, well, now I guess I can talk because after all these public relations people for Goldman Sachs are done. So what's all really all you said? Wow. Kramer goes ballistic. I'm not a public relationship with Goldman Sachs. I'm offended. I'm offended. I'm offended. Oh, there we go again. The first secret about

1:34:42 Goldman don't talk about Goldman you still there I'm still here, but yeah, we just crapped out for a second. Okay. We're good So anyway, I think it's a very funny clip and you get a kick out of it But they threw him off but besides just throwing him you know the way you would do this I think I mean she says we're throwing you off the show. She basically she's you have to be more polite Argue on these shows, but apparently was not arguing correctly by the yeah You'll be very proud of me, John. I have a closing clip for today's show, which will play after we're done, of my friend Rachel Maddow interviewing Janet Napolitano. Oh, brother. And it's an eight-minute clip. We could actually go through that clip and deconstruct the entire thing, but it would take us an hour to do it. But at the very end,

1:35:36 At the very end of this clip, Maddow actually suggests Napolitano should be the incoming Supreme Court justice. Oh, no! It was a dyke fest. It was un... I want to play you that little bit. Yeah, please. It was so funny. For the protection of the public safety. There are other reasons as well, but it was no surprise to me when I was governor of Arizona that by... This is about the commemoration of the Oklahoma City bombing. Yeah, there's a million speeches. Yeah, so here she comes. Large law enforcement, the men and women who are charged with protecting public safety, oppose legislation like that.

1:36:14 One last question for you, Madam Secretary, and I'm sure you're going to dodge it, but I'm going to ask it anyway. Ready? Wouldn't being on the Supreme Court be a great job? Well, nice try, but I'm flattered to be asked. But I'm focused on the job I have, and as you've already described, it's a big one. Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano. She actually does a namaste bow to Napolitano at the end. She's Madam Secretary, and she puts her hands together like namaste and says, thank you so much for being on the show. Thank you so much for being on the show. Namaste. Napolitano, a very, very busy person by definition.

1:36:52 Thank you so much for joining us tonight. I appreciate your time. Thank you for having me. I'll play that whole clip. It is disgusting. It's unbelievable when you hear the whole thing, you'll just go, ah. Anyway, that's coming up in a bit after we close it. I only have one other clip which is kind of interesting because I you know I don't know how anyone could I don't have anything against people's names, you know because I can't pronounce them apparently but but Blanche always seems to be some sort of a Like a sitcom name. Yeah, just what I was gonna say wife on a sitcom. Yeah So, uh, here's a little clip, uh... Is that your nose whistling? No, that was actually my squeaky voice. I don't know how that happened. It's the chemtrails. It's a strange sound. Anyway, so play this thing and then I want to just make a comment. Is short-selling a derivative of... Wait, wait, stop.

1:37:45 This is again on C-SPAN and this is an interview that went on. It was quite interesting. It's another book that might be worth looking at. It's called Don't Blame the Shorts. And this is the author and they were talking about short selling and how well it helps to balance markets and why it's important and why people should, short sellers should never be blamed for anything because they're not really doing anything wrong. Horowitz and I have discussed this particular issue numerous times on DH Unplugged. Well you have to be able to speculate on a market going up and down, right? That's what short selling is. Yeah, you have to, but it helps balance things. If something goes up too much, the shorts will come in because they think it's going up too much. It'll stabilize. It actually stabilizes the market.

1:38:23 instead of something just going crazy and then crashing. So it's very important, the function that you actually have it. And this guy explains it very well in his book. But this little topic comes up, which flabbergasts the guy when the question is asked, not to mention the fact that the interviewer doesn't even know what short selling is and suggests it's a thread. And her name is Blanche. Is she hot? Blanche Lincoln? I don't know. She's a... well just listen and you can go look her up while you're playing this game. Is short selling a derivative and would you comment on Senator Blanche Lincoln's proposal to prohibit all derivative transactions?

1:39:03 Proposing to eliminate all derivative transactions is, I think, in this day and age, is like saying, let's propose a law that says we can't drive. We need, whether we like it or not, and whether we think people act irresponsibly or not, the fact is that bank balance sheets and what's on the balance sheets of these banks is almost the size of the GDP. They are part of our economy. And I think disallowing derivatives and just saying we're going to ban it, I don't know how you would get anything done. I don't know how we would issue treasury bills, for example, to finance all the health care and other things that we want to use our money for. Robert Sloan is our guest. Tell us what S3 Partners is.

1:39:53 All right, so I was actually flabbergasted and I didn't surprise me getting more publicity that some Senator from the United States of America would make a suggestion that we ban all I mean essentially it is based the dollar bill itself as a derivative It doesn't really have any Paper But the fact that somebody would suggest this because she read something about credit default swaps being the problem or something like that indicates to me that some people are idiots and they shouldn't be in office. Now this woman's a Democrat in Arkansas and apparently she's not going to be in office much longer. I did a little research and discovered that she's not well liked. Let me just say, if she's the kind of chick, if she

1:40:40 If she's hovering above you and then pulls out the bobby pin and the hair flows down, she could be pretty hot. So I Get that impression, but for you yeah, because you like that type. She's milfy. She's totally very milfy But the fact is she's obviously an idiot That's the best kind what are you talking about? Please so you wrote her out. Oh my goodness so the one thing that I mean, there's only so much work I can do based upon the finances of the show and other work that has to be done. I was not able to get a video of the first Americanized debate over in Gitmo Nation East United Kingdom as they are now moving into election season.

1:41:37 But I did see everyone going, oh Nick Clegg! Nick Clegg, he's great! He's the guy, he really did it for me! Nick Clegg! Nick Clegg, he's the new hero! Nick Clegg, it's time for change! So they're doing this, uh... These election debates Americana style. Yeah, they put three people up in front of the audience American style. And I mean, it's more the real debates in Parliament where they actually yell at each other is more interesting than this crap. Well, so, so, and they're kind of doing it on an 80s game show set. Yep. And so I see one article which I kind of liked from the Telegraph, Nick Clegg, the new Susan Boyle in politics. So this guy is like, he's coming out of nowhere and he's with the Lib Dems and he's awesome. Let me just give you a little background on Nick Clegg.

1:42:30 So he is the leader of the UK's Liberal Democrat Party. He supports the war in Afghanistan. He's an elite. His mother, Yulali Hermans Van der Waal-Bakke, is Dutch. His father is the son of a half-Russian merchant banker. In fact, his dad is the chairman of the United Trust Bank. This guy is so connected, connected to Russian nobility. His great aunt was the Russian spy Baroness Mura Budberg Bunningshausen. She was the mistress of the British spy Bruce Lockhart.

1:43:06 She spied for the Soviet Union in the 20s and was described by MI5 as a very dangerous woman. I mean this guy is so connected, he is a complete elitist and everyone's running away like, oh he's wonderful, Nick Clegg, he's saying it. And he's like this young, you know, dapper kind of boy. So you watch Gitmo Nation East. It's coming upon you now. There it's a total it's a TV show you're watching you're not watching elections. You're watching a television show. It's a reality show What isn't Cameron a shoe in on this election? They're setting this guy for the next time no I think Clegg is I think he's coming out of left field I don't know where he's gonna be like the new hope

1:43:50 Sound like anything you've seen happen recently in a country? Hmm. Oh by the way speaking of such American thinker had a great post American thinker calm Title of it Obama's missing girlfriends, and I really like this In all the books written about Obama even his own book There's mention of you know the many girlfriends and everything, but where are they who are they? Will the real girlfriends of Obama please step forward? No one has ever spoken to or heard of or interviewed any of Obama's girlfriends. That's a great angle. It's a good story. It's in the show notes at noagendashow.com, which are packed once again today. And we have a subscription box you can sign up to. We'll soon be sending them out via email. Can that really happen soon, John? How are the signups going?

1:44:45 We need a new either. They're not as strong as I'd hoped you know I'm not sure we'll do give us another week, okay? But anyway, I'm like wow that what an interesting angle And if you know one of his girlfriends, yeah A couple of things just to clear up this by the way is a nice little note of hope I guess in a way and In the morning Adam and John, I'm Dieter Archer, a 14 year old No Agenda listener. My friend Kevin Porter turned me on to the show about a year ago. I tried to get my dad to listen to No Agenda, but he thinks what you guys say is just crazy.

1:45:30 I want to tell you in short what I am learning in school about the Civil War. This has been a topic for the past three episodes of No Agenda Show. Basically, I am being taught that slavery is the big reason why we had the war. My book My book teaches me all about the compromises the North and the South made to keep the Union together, but all the teachers say is how the North and South were fighting over states being slave or free states. I asked my teacher if the Civil War could have happened because of Britain and France, but she said it was not possible and did not happen.

1:46:15 I really like no agenda. I always greet people with an in the morning but they don't get it. I was going to try to start a podcast with Kevin wondering if we could be allowed to greet each other with an in the morning and say stuff like what you guys have in the jingles. Hope 2 to the head is not in your future. Sincerely, Dieter Archer. Dieter please steal all of our jingles start your show. We'll promote it our show is open source Yeah, of course, so that's the whole point you can make money off of it. We got no agenda stuff calm Just send us something from time to time help us out. We don't want to have to manage any of that crap Yeah, no, that's exactly what we're thinking. That's our thinking is this. I've talked to people about this. So well, you know, just begging for money thing. I'm saying, you know, the great thing about begging for money, which we have to do to support the show, but people do it voluntarily and they give us, they help us to contribute to the show. And is that

1:47:08 I think just go steal the show. Run it on your own blog. Take copies of it and pass them around because we don't have, we don't have like, we're not counting numbers. We don't need to know for our Nielsen rating so we can tell an advertiser that well, we got this many people listening today. We don't have to do any of that. So the show can just go out there because the idea is to get this show out and have people listen to it. All we're trying to do here is get people to think critically. That's our only goal and I'm still disappointed every so often when somebody sends me a, here look at this and it's either a look over there moment or some other piece of crap that you know, it's like think about this, think more critically. Why is this thing showing up on your doorstep? Is there some rationale they're trying to make you think a certain way? Are you trying to be, most of the stuff that goes on in the media is trying to trick you.

1:48:01 So here, think about this one. April 13th, an executive order from our Presidente, blocking property of certain persons contributing to the conflict in Somalia. This is a presidential order basically, where's Somalia again, John? It's in Africa. Don't we have pirates around there? There's a pirate phenomenon, yes, and there's also a... What is near there? You're you're idiotic stargate exactly. Thank you very much You call it idiotic, but now the president is if having 300 warships around this stargate wasn't enough Now you can't you can't go there. You can't take money from there. You can't support companies that do business there Stay away stay away because we're protecting the stargate

1:48:56 Not reported at all by the way in the in the stream. This is why Dieter's dad thinks that the show's crazy. Yeah, wait until that fucker opens up. Not reported at all for good reason. Screw you! Screw you, Dvorak! Screw you! Okay, there's a couple of links about the Polish 2 to the head. Interestingly enough, there actually was some good ground-to-air guidance systems installed there when I think Putin flew there a couple months ago and apparently it was either A removed or B not turned on when a known flight was coming in. This thing is so bullcrap. It's like they crashed because of the mist. And now the story is the plane clipped a birch tree

1:49:56 Oh, they changed it. Yeah, it clipped a... instead of clipping an ant... first I said it clipped an antenna, now it... no, it clipped a birch tree. It's a big-ass plane. Let me see. Plane, birch tree. Who's gonna win? Clipped a birch tree indeed. Do they even... do birch trees even grow there? I would think so, yeah, because it's cold. Yeah, no, birch tree is a cold weather tree. Okay. Does it snap easily? Uh, it's a hardwood. Okay. Hmm. So it might. I was just like hmm. I'm sure if it's a 50 foot wide birch tree it would probably have some, you know, the plane would be at a disadvantage. Coming up in May, just so y'all can get ready for it, the FEMA National Level Exercise NLE10. The exercise is meant for preparedness and readiness.

1:50:50 Tier 1 national level exercise, as per the National Exercise Program, it is domestic terrorism focused. Guided by national planning scenario number one. What could that be, John? How about nuclear detonation? Is that what it's going to be? Yep. Guided by national planning scenario number one. It works in... When's the movie going to premiere? The movie's already out. It was brilliant. Didn't you see it? It's countdown to zero. Actually, this may be... You know, we've discussed this in the past. We haven't done it so much recently. But every so often something comes out that's going to get a lot of publicity and coincidentally promote a movie. Yep. Now here it is.

1:51:33 Here it is. Yeah, this is a movie promotion. Yeah, this is it's promotion for the movie and to make you afraid That's what it's all for just make you scared Well the movie the movie in combination with the movie. I'm sure you'll be shaking in your boots alright See anything else? Speaking of movies David was what's his name the director of avatar? Yeah. James Cameron. James Cameron. David Cameron. Probably brothers. In Brazil, a judge on Friday overturned a decision that could have delayed construction of a huge Amazon dam opposed by environmentalists.

1:52:17 Indians and the director of Avatar according to Associated Press. James Cameron, he's down there like... What does he got to do with it? Well, he's... Remember we played that clip? He's like, I have so much... I have fuck you money now. I'm gonna go save the world. Stop the dams! The dams are killing the world! What is wrong with dams? And Sigourney Weaver who starred in Avatar accompanied Cameron. Oh, I wonder what's up with those two. Of course the visit was reminiscent of a 1989 trip by rock star Stink who protested the same dam alongside Indians with big plates in their mouths for visual effect.

1:53:04 What is the problem? The dam is for hydroelectric power. It's green energy, man, green energy. No, no, but the environmentalists are against it. It's because of the damage the dam would cause. In Africa? Brazil. On Brazil? Mm-hmm. What damage is it going to cause? I don't know, but it's enough for Cameron to fly down there, bone and Sigourney Weaver. Talking to Stinks friends to say, whoa, we have to stop this. It's a party. It's a drinking club. And President Obama dutifully released his tax returns. He made five million bucks last year. In what? I don't know if it's specified that way. How does a standing president make five million bucks during his term in office?

1:53:58 Well, jointly they reported their adjusted gross income as $5,505,409. They paid $1.792 million in federal income tax, charitable contributions $329. He did give away his $1.4 million Nobel Peace Prize. I guess that was a part of it, but still it's a cool three and a half, or like three million he made. Probably from his book and stuff like that. And he's the king... Wait, wait, wait, what was his charitable donations? His charitable donations... $329,100. Well then where's the rest of the money?

1:54:36 from the Nobel Peace Prize. He would have to declare that as income. Well, actually, I take it back. You get the Nobel Peace Prize tax-free, so that wasn't even counted in his income. So he actually made six plus million. And if he gave it away, he could probably, in fact, I'm sure he could deduct it. And the deduction would be more than 350,000 bucks. So something's wrong with these numbers. Not bad for a senator, huh? Former senator. The kicker is Biden's income was Biden's income $333,000. Yeah, I think that's high for him. How about that number? It's the magic numbers. $333,000. Well, that's actually kind of cool. I like that. That's awesome. Biden should listen to our show. It's a big fucking deal, man. No agenda.

1:55:38 And then the FBI is allowing the Kennedys to keep many of Ted's embarrassing records private. How does that work? There is, you're talking about his private, those are private to begin with, right? Those are just his diaries I guess, I don't know. responding to a newspaper's public records request, public records request, the Justice Department agency is in the process of releasing thousands of pages of files involving the legendary Massachusetts Democrat who died of brain cancer. Problem is, some of the information from his storied decades-long political career is likely to upset the family according to the FBI.

1:56:19 That's why the feds are giving the Kennedy clan a rare opportunity to raise objections before the public disclosure of his exhaustive and secret FBI file. I guess that's chap a critic has something to do with that or so who knows just thought it's interesting if you're if you're an elite then you get to do whatever you want. Sorry, yeah, I miss you. You just blanked out. I said if you're an elite you get to do everything you want. Yeah, obviously. Well, I think we have to wrap this thing and get that long clip played. Yeah, that's the Rachel Maddow clip. I do just want to say that interesting observation that many of the big health insurance companies, it has now been revealed, of course, these are really financial companies and they are directly related to all of the big so-called banks, investment banks, who don't actually hold your money but invest money for rich people.

1:57:16 And themselves so they they invest money they take your money and they invest it make more money out of that pay themselves handsome bonuses and when you need to pay your bill they fuck you. They are investing heavily in fast food restaurants. How does that work? Yeah, I heard this is hilarious. That's great. So you know that's probably a good investment for them. Yeah, it's a great investment. It's just it's it's a little bit crooked Don't you think? Wait a minute. How does that work exactly? Okay, so coming up the Rachel Maddow eight and a half minute interview with Janet Napolitano Who was dressed very?

1:57:57 very femininely for the occasion. It's just there is a connotation. I don't care who they're sleeping with but it's just kind of interesting and I will put the video in the show notes at noagendashow.com so you can see that namaste bow that Rachel does to Napolitano. But just listen to this whole thing. The words you will say consistently are, oh brother. And well we'll see how Ashmageddon does on Thursday, John. Yeah, yeah, it's probably still be going on. So coming to you from the hilltop watchtower, Crackpot Command Center, where they're still trying to mess with my connection here in the People's Republic of Southern California. My name is Adam Curry. And from Northern Silicon Valley, where I'll probably get cut off in a minute anyway, I'm John C. Dvorak. We will be back on Thursday with the early service on another edition of the No Agenda Show right here at noagendashow.com.

1:59:12 Joining us now for the interview, I've been very much looking forward to this discussion, is Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano. Madam Secretary, thank you so much for joining us. Well, thank you. As a U.S. attorney in Arizona at the time, 15 years ago, I know that you were part of the investigation into the Oklahoma City bombing. You'll be participating in the commemoration on Monday. Do you feel like we approach the threat of domestic terrorism differently now as a country than we did before that incident? Well, yes, in part because every time there is an incident, and it's hard to describe something as horrific as the bombing of the Murrah building as an incident. It was an outrageous criminal act.

1:59:53 But every time one of those things happens, we learn. We apply that in a law enforcement way to the next set of events. So yes, experience does teach us some things. And unfortunately, the Murrah Building bombing taught us a lot. In terms of that, and I know that I'm raising a report for which there was a lot of political heat. Your department got some heat last year when you put out a report that said the current economic and political climate has some similarities to the 90s when right-wing extremism experienced a resurgence. In terms of that report, in terms of your government's advice and support to local law enforcement,

2:00:36 How do you advise them and how does the country dealing with the threat of domestic extremism now? Well, what we do is we work with law enforcement to give them information. Information about threats that we are seeing, information about trends that we are discerning so that they are better prepared to protect public safety on the ground. And we in turn receive information back from local law enforcement. And so, you know, we will provide information, for example, We had a recent case where individuals were buying large amounts of hydrogen peroxide to make explosives. It got into the news. We advise local law enforcement to watch for unusual purchases of hydrogen peroxide. That's the kind of direct

2:01:29 tactical information that we want to get into the hands of law enforcement. What were some of the things that law enforcement did with some of the more extremist militia groups and other domestic terrorist organizations as you define them in the report last year? What were some of the things that law enforcement did right to essentially stem the growth of those groups after Oklahoma City? Well, I think in a way, Oklahoma City was such an outrageous criminal act that in and of itself it had an effect on the growth of militia movements, of armed violent militia movements. And so we did see almost an immediate drop off after 1995.

2:02:16 We've had militia groups, our militia groups, from time to time throughout American history and indeed throughout the last decades. They seem to kind of come in and come out as circumstances change. Prior to 1995, the Murrah Building bombing, they were really a rapidly growing phenomenon throughout the United States, particularly in some areas of the states like Arizona where I was the United States Attorney. Then they seem to have dissipated and now of course recently, recent events show us that we have some groups starting up again.

2:02:52 Considering the threat of terror from abroad and Department of Homeland Security's role in international counterterrorism, I know that you're just back from Nigeria, the home country of the attempted Christmas Day bomber. I know you were there to meet with leaders of a whole host of African countries about boosting the international side of airline security. What was accomplished there? What are leaders agreeing to to try to fill some of those gaps? Really, it's an amazing global response to the attempted bombing on Christmas Day where region by region around the world we are forging a consensus about information collection, information sharing, passenger vetting and improved security at airports.

2:03:37 I think people already will have seen some of the things going into place in airports in the United States. It's objectively better technology for discerning someone who may be trying to bring explosives or other material onto an airplane. But we're seeing the same kind of response internationally, and it was particularly encouraging to see it amongst the Union of African Nations over this past weekend. I was thinking about preparing for this interview, this chance to talk to you today, and trying to narrow down all the things that are in your purview as Secretary of Homeland Security. Good luck with that. Exactly. I mean, there's something like 200,000 employees in this agency, 22 agencies all brought under one, everything from FEMA and airline security and H1N1 and drugs and immigration and all of these different things.

2:04:32 I don't know that you can actually answer this and still be politic, but does the Department of Homeland Security make sense that it's one thing? I'm not sure what the advantage is that all of these things are in one agency now. Look, it was born out of 9-11 and I think it does make sense but you have to kind of take all those 22 agencies and boil them down into what are the major missions that we are focused upon so that we can really sculpt a vision for the entire department. And so when you do that, you know, we're really focused on counterterrorism. We're focusing on securing our borders, be they land, air or sea. We're focused on immigration, immigration enforcement, even as we advocate for reform of the immigration law.

2:05:23 We're focused on protection of cyberspace and I think we're the first US department that's really singled that out as a, you know, kind of the next wave of things that needs our focus. And then finally, the ability to respond, prepare for and respond to natural disasters. And when you boil it down to those five major functions, then you can really see how the department and all of its various components make sense. I could also see how if I had your job, I'd want to clone myself five times. So I could have one person in charge of each of those things, plus a spare to rest. Indeed. On that issue of immigration, not in your Department of Homeland Security purview, because this is at the state level, but your home state of Arizona this week has passed a very, very strong anti-immigration bill. I think of it as the Papers Please bill.

2:06:15 It compels police officers to demand papers from anyone they reasonably suspect of being an illegal immigrant. It's now a misdemeanor to not carry your immigration paperwork with you at all times in Arizona. Didn't you veto something like that when you were governor there? I think I vetoed things like that at least twice. And I did because, first of all, immigration is primarily federal. Not exclusively, but primarily federal. But secondly, It doesn't allow law enforcement to focus on where law enforcement needs to focus and to prioritize the way law enforcement needs the ability to prioritize for the protection of the public safety. There are other reasons as well, but it was no surprise to me when I was governor of Arizona that by and large, law enforcement, the men and women who are charged with protecting public safety, oppose legislation like that.

2:07:12 One last question for you, Madam Secretary, and I'm sure you're going to dodge it, but I'm going to ask it anyway. Ready? Wouldn't being on the Supreme Court be a great job? Well, nice try, but I'm flattered to be asked. But I'm focused on the job I have, and as you've already described, it's a big one. Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano, a very, very busy person by definition. Thank you so much for joining us tonight. I appreciate your time. Thank you for having me.