Topic: Beagle

A Baltimore tourist survived a fall into the crater of Mount Vesuvius while attempting a selfie. In Virginia, 4,000 beagles are being rescued from a research facility due to mistreatment, which the hosts link to NIH-funded experiments. The show closes with reports of fuel protests and gang violence in Haiti.

The hosts read through various donations and messages, including a humorous warning about owning beagles and a request for "Goat Karma." They highlight the ongoing legal battle of Lindsey Fox and "No Check Meats" in Wisconsin against USDA mandates. The segment concludes with a mention of the closure of Enstrom Helicopter in Menominee, Michigan.

Documents obtained by the White Coat Waste Project reveal that Dr. Anthony Fauci's agency spent over $400,000 on experiments involving beagles at the University of Georgia. The dogs were reportedly infected with parasites and injected with experimental vaccines, causing them to "vocalize in pain." The hosts suggest that stories involving animal cruelty are particularly effective at damaging the public reputation of government officials.

Various producers are thanked for their donations, including Sir Brian Warden and Tony Cabrera. Sir John Overall discusses his "2030 Countdown" project. Baron Dirty Dick Bangs of DC donates in honor of a late pet and requests karma for "parasitic douchebags" who do not donate.

A discussion of the TV show "Hoarders" leads into a report on a scientific breakthrough in South Korea: a genetically engineered, glow-in-the-dark beagle with an "on and off" switch. Researchers claim the cloning technique used to create the dog will assist in finding treatments for degenerative diseases like Alzheimer's and Parkinson's.

Upon arriving in San Francisco, Curry encountered a customs beagle and expresses surprise that the dog did not detect "herbs" left in his jacket pocket. The hosts debate whether the dog was trained for drugs, bombs, or agricultural products like fruit and nuts. Curry also complains about the poor treatment of "upper class" luggage by ground handling services.