John C. Dvorak Pickpocketed in Madrid Subway
John C. Dvorak reports being pickpocketed by an elderly woman and an accomplice while riding the subway in Madrid, Spain. The theft resulted in the loss of his U.S. passport and two credit cards, leading to complications with Delta Airlines and the U.S. State Department. Dvorak criticizes the lack of assistance from the U.S. Embassy in Madrid, which remained closed for the President's Day holiday despite his travel emergency.
madrid· spain· pickpocket· passport· delta airlines· american express· state department
00:00 the twitter thing doesn't work and i'm sure it's on cd or it's on a february twentieth two thousand eleven times you get a nation media assassination episode two eight zero is is no agenda doing my part to outcasts all the rest of the slaves here from the hilltop watchtower crackpot command center in the nation's west in the people's republic of southern california in the morning i'm adam curry and from uh... Ditto Nation, Castanets soon to be renamed. I'm John C. DeVorek. Not tomorrow. Seriously. I have to stay here because our State Department... Yeah. This is good. I'm getting lots of material. Wait a minute. Ho, ho, ho, ho. This is thanks to you because we have to do the show on time every day. Okay, hold on. So I sacrifice. I take this day off. Now I'm here stuck. Hold on a second. Back it up for a moment. You got pickpocketed? What was the whore's name? It was an old woman from what I could... as I recall. Right. It's pretty funny. Well, how did it happen? Give me this. It was on the subway.
01:13 Oh my god. I didn't realize it until I just, it was, it was, you know, it was slick. But just to tell you the point, what the real point is. No, no, no, we'll get to that in a second. Human resources need to know. I've been pickpocketed. Well, I got pickpocketed in Reno once. I got picked, which is why I thought it was cool. Right, but what was the distraction? Not this old hag? Yes, this old woman. She was trying to get off and then she decided to get back on and she bumps into me. That's the only time I got bumped because there's always a bump involved. Of course it is, yeah. and there was a switch she was just an annoying old lady knowing all lady you just get it makes you go to your brain you go out and annoying old lady everything is a pickpocket working so she bumped you and that was a you had in your inside park pocket inside your story that i don't know is in a front pocket i think she had an accomplished i'm not sure cuz i can imagine she could have possibly done it john it's a it's crazy because i imagine you to be a fanny pack kinda guy
02:03 No, no, I imagine you to be one of those guys who has like a leather necklace with his passport in a document carrier around your neck. Yeah, you really think that? Yes, I have those visualizations. You think I carry a fanny pack? Well, you know what? You'd have your passport now, wouldn't you? Normally I wouldn't be carrying my passport around but they want you to carry it around a lot. So anyway, no normally I actually I would keep it in a zippered pocket and for some reason it wasn't in there. It was in my front pocket which is usually pretty safe but anyway so I got picked by it. So I ended up losing a passport and a, I got two credit cards which we just canceled and fixed. I'll probably get an American Express replaced.
02:54 probably tomorrow because American Express works on Mondays in a country that has no holiday this coming Monday as opposed to our State Department which seems to close its embassy around the world for President's Day. They got to take advantage of the car sales for President's Day and then the kicker is Actually, I got a lot of good stories. First of all, so I have to change my flight. So Delta Airlines, if you try calling them on any number anywhere in the world, and my favorite one is you call their 800 number using international calling on a regular phone and it calls and it gets you and they get this message at the beginning saying, this 1-800 number is not valid in the country you're calling from. You will be charged at international rates if you do not want this hang up.
03:46 So then the Delta thing comes on, so I don't hang up. Comes on and says, oh, just because of the bad weather we've had to staff a lot more people and so we're behind. Please shut up slave and wait for someone to take your call essentially. No. Click. So I tried it again, same thing. They just hang up on you. So I can't Ask them about you know this thing that's on the website about possibly getting out tomorrow Because there's some process you can do it without a passport. Oh, yeah, good luck Yeah, hi they said they said I could come into the country without a passport yes Let me send you this link to this page and let's just go over this in fact. There's a couple interesting things here Well, am I this interested?
04:44 Yeah. I'd like the human interest side of the story more. Let's get back to the old hag. No, no. This is part of it. The old lady, I mean, I never... What can I say? Just the old lady. Usually it's a hooker who comes up to you and goes, oh, I love you, and she hugs you and that's when it happens. I wouldn't know that. By the way, this is the story of the old lady, everybody. It's the story. If it was a hooker, it would be a better story. I would have used it. Okay Okay, hold on a second. Yeah, okay. I just want you to read something. I know this may be tedious Yeah, somewhat, but okay. I feel your pain. Yeah, but I don't have clips. Yeah, I got clip I have I did over time by the way there are some really interesting I've been I have been following stuff, so it's kind of interesting internationally hold on I think this is it okay there once we get past this from begin I can harp on this later Okay, go to that website page mm-hmm
05:39 Ah, yes. Lost and stolen U.S. passports abroad. What should you do if you're a citizen and your passport is lost or stolen? Contact your embassy or consulate. Okay, stop, stop, stop. Go down, down, down, down, almost to the bottom where it says, of course, are our fees going to be charged? Oh, yes. Of course. Can the U.S. ... the last question. Yes, can the U.S. embassy issue a replacement passport over a weekend or a holiday? Now go to paragraph 2 and start reading. If you are scheduled to travel directly to the United States, the duty officer may be able to assist in issuing a transportation letter to the airline and alerting U.S. Customs and Immigration to the fact that you will be attempting to enter the United States without a passport. Now duty officers must focus primary attention on life or death emergencies. No, that's the kicker. If you don't have a life or death emergency, they're not going to care.
06:41 No, that's not the answer they give you. Yes it is. They say that that... It is the answer. No, that's not the answer. What do you mean it is? I've talked to them. How do you know? I've asked them about this letter of transport. and they tell me it's bullshit. We wrote that in 1999. No, no, they say that and they don't even know it exists. They say, this woman, that's the duty officer here in Madrid, and by the way I called Washington DC too, and they say, oh well let's look into it, and they transfer me to somebody else, the foreign duty officer says, oh okay well let's look into it, and then he says, I'm transferring you to the Madrid duty officer and hangs up on me. Click. It's like it's the same woman again, and she says, oh you again.
07:22 So no, I talked to her and she's there with her husband apparently also works at the embassy and I know what they're doing. And they got a little cottage industry going on there. You watch this is gonna cost you $800 I guarantee ya. Right, this is another good reason not to do the show every week on time. Anyway, the So she says that she's never heard of this policy. I said it's right on the website, you can read it. She says it must be an old website. Yeah, I told you, an $18 million website. It's not an old website, it's brand new. In fact, the old website's still around and it tells you to go to this new website. It's one of the new $8 million websites.
08:02 And so she's, no, no, this must be before 9-11. I never heard of this. And then she said, she started talking to my husband. He's never heard of such a thing. So what's going on? This is our government at work getting paid all this money, living it up in Madrid, doing dinner parties. And I'm like, you know, reading from their own website and they're telling me this is bullshit. There you go. So, there's gambling going on there, huh? Really? Our government's messed up. Well, goodnight everybody. We had a fantastic show once again. Unbelievable. I'm really sorry for you. I guess the upgrade is out of the question now as well. What upgrade? Well, you're not going to be using, they're not going to accept your miles if you miss your original flight. I'm on the same ticket. I'm on the same ticket. I get the same upgrade. Yeah, right. You'll see. You'll see.
08:49 Alright, so when are you coming back, honey? When do we have to go for you? Well, it depends. I'm supposed to be coming back tomorrow, I mean, originally, and then it will be Tuesday now. Alert the office. Grumet, you listening? So it'll be Tuesday. that assuming i get in and out of the part of the consulate before like ten o'clock so i can jump on a cab to get to the airport for my eleven thirty flight uh... i'm assuming i'm not going to wait days on end all lives possible i won't get back to wednesday uh... yes well i'm so sorry about that man the socks i don't have to list what's really interesting is the fact that the you know they were did services so poor
09:31 I mean, is American Express going to get me a new card? You know what's next? We're going to have video of you walking around looking really dazed with your shoes off and then you'll be found in a dumpster. This is just the beginning. First we remember that if you see that it's something bad has happened, it's bullcrap whatever you read. Something has happened. First he lost his identity. He thought he was like some writer from San Francisco. Oh come here sir. You're clearly disturbed. Don't wear a cravat, whatever you do. That's not a good idea right now, okay? Oh my goodness, oh wow. Alright, well in the morning then. Anything to top that? No, I think that's toppers. A pretty boring life here compared to your life of international intrigue.
